Writing for a Cause

The Curse of Child Servitude

2012-01-19T00:12:00.001+05:00

A girl not more than ten years ofage trying to lift quite a healthy kid up, who I am sure was heavier than her,to a ride. She loses her balance in an effort to do so. This was a scene I gotto see at a famous fast food restaurant play area. Yes! That little girl was aservant to a big happy family. The parents sit alone and dine in while theservants babysit the mischievous kids. Babysitting of course includes feedingthem, taking full care of them that they don’t get lost and also bearing withall their stubbornness.

Getting help of a servant is notbad at all, it’s just you should at least consider the age of a person beforeyou hire him/her. How can you expect a kid, who herself/himself is not able to carryher/his own burden, to help you in a task you yourself can’t do alone? Thinkabout your own kids for a while; what if they are made to do stuff you expectthe little servants to do. You of course dread seeing that.

If women are too insecure oftheir female servants that they will steal away their husbands, they should beequally uncomfortable with their men sexually harassing these little servants.You cannot deny the fact that this happens a lot. Men should also take care ofthe fact that the servant they hire should be old enough to carry the burden ofthe work load they assign them.

Another excuse people give for childlabor is that the children’s parents themselves bring the kids to them for thispurpose. You cannot just blame them about it. You are equally at fault when youhire them than their parents or maybe more. If you are kind enough to helpthem, be sensible in doing so. Spend some money on their kids’ education andgive them a better future. Getting them enrolled to a not-so-expensive school won’tbe a tough job. You just will have to cut down your dine out routines a bit tohelp them.

People hire these little childrennot just as their domestic servants but also to their workplaces. One of themain reasons is that you get it cheap. Tea-stalls, workshops or any other placeyou see the kids working; it’s always the job tougher than they can bear. Worseis when the same little angels are made to do harsher jobs like molding bricksor making glass bangles. We should make an effort to bring a relief to thesekids in some way. Even a change in our attitude or just a kind word can make adifference at times.

Just look at the kids who work at your housesor workplaces for a change and think about it; do they really deserve doingwhat they are? What if it was your kid instead of that poor soul? How do theyfeel, when they look at all those luxuries you provide your kids with, livingat your house? I am sure you will feel bad. If you can’t do any good for them;stop doing bad. If you feel bad for them or their families; hiring them is nota solution. Walk in their shoes for a while and think of better ways to helpthem. Say no to child labor. It’s a crime, it’s a curse!

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They Once Had It All

2011-10-28T00:42:00.000+05:00

Living near a kachi abaadi (slums) these days makes me wonder at times. What are we? We have everything at one moment and we can be left with nothing at all the very next moment. I see the old, the young, the kids and the infants around in filthy clothes eating and drinking things which we can’t even look at. The quality of water we use in our washrooms or the type of diet we feed our pets with sure is better than the one they eat and drink. But the question is: do they have an option? They of course have none.

The people living in this kachi abaadi near our university have migrated from Afghanistan for the reasons we all know. They had to leave everything they had there and come here to save their lives. They might have dreamt of a better future before they left their country. But, unfortunately, the worst awaited them in Pakistan.

The most disturbing fact about these immigrants is our attitude towards them. The disgusted look we give them, the way we hold our breaths when we cross that area and the way we push their kids away when they accidently bump into us. We never thought about working for their rehabilitation. We never thought about educating their kids, never fed them proper food, never even thought about providing them even a portion of what we have. If we don’t do anything for them; we have no right to treat them the way we do.

The good thing I see in that area is the satisfaction. I smell some strange sort of cheerfulness in that area. They have no electricity, their kids either sleep hungry or beg for food and eat, they wear the filthiest of clothes, they live in those mud/tent houses or even worse in the worst of weather conditions, they don’t even have a hope for the better future; but I still see the contentment on their faces. They never are depressed like us. We have all but we are all depressed and they have almost nothing and they seem happy.

We (including me) not only need to help them monetarily and morally but also have to learn some great lessons from them. First thing, nothing to be proud of what we have; what we have today can be turned into dust in no time. Second, try being happy and content in what we have; that content feeling has more power than any material thing in this world. Just give it a try, I am sure, it will bring in a positive change in our lives.

THE ABOVE POST WAS ALSO PUBLISHED ON www.sarakhalili.blogspot.com

Watch your actions

2011-06-26T20:07:00.001+05:00

Yesterday while watching a Sunny Deol starrer movie, a dialogue of his co-actor caught mine utmost attention. The dialogue emphasized on mastering one’s anger before it becomes dreadful. And, I truly believe in managing and regulating our anger. Anger if not controlled becomes our worst enemy. It’s a two-sided sword which injures its user more than the person unto which it was angled. Even the top-notch MNC’s recruit counselors to look after anger management of their employees.

Having being monstrously taught about transducers I felt the need of using one’s anger efficiently for some useful purposes.
I was flabbergasted when I Googled and found that research is being under taken at various universities throughout the world to transform the raw energy in a person while he is angry for producing power to light a bulb. Isn’t it amazing?

Still, I’m lingering far away from the actual topic which I wanted to bring forward through this post. You don’t need to be a historian to see that at times world history has been changed and turned upside down just by the wrong actions of few lunatic and brutish people.

If the young British officer had thought twice before throwing Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi out of the train in South Africa than British government not only in South Africa but also in India would have left unhurt from the wave of Mahatma. Hitler was a great leader, orator and a patriot yet he committed suicide all because of his heinous crimes. He could have gained the reputation of a national hero if his actions would have been constructive.

Before plunging into a deal one should always try to look into the consequences which may occur. It’s of no use to cry over spilt milk. Actions once have done leads to equal reactions.

‘Do unto others as you would have loved others do unto you’.

The other day I was watching a video of Neil Pasricha of 1000 awesome things fame, where he gave a brilliant insight about the three A’s of life. Sitting examples from his personal life he articulated the importance of a positive attitude, awareness and authenticity as the three A’s of an awesome life. A successful person always has a positive attitude. He is someone who is more aware of his surroundings, work, family and future than any other person. His each and every action is authentic till the last limit and all this in unison makes him a noteworthy person.

Change your attitude!
When you change your attitude,
You change your behavior;
When you change your behavior,
You change your performance;
When you change your performance,
You change your life!

By Walter Doyle Staples

Watch your actions, before it gets too late to repent...!

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Fate or injustice?

2011-06-17T18:51:00.002+05:00

This is a true story of a woman suffering from continuous abuse at the hands of her husband...

This is the story of a young woman - a sister, a daughter, a mother, but most of all a divorcee, dependent on her parents. Naeema (not her real name) underwent an arranged marriage two years ago. Feeling that everybody in the family blamed her for the break-up of an earlier engagement (her fiancé had called it off because she refused to have a sexual relationship with him before marriage), she agreed to the proposal despite her misgivings.

The wedding was a traditional one and everyone in her family was happy. And then the wedding ended and the marriage started. The first thing her new husband said to her was, “I need the money you received in salami (money given by relatives); I have to pay all the bills.” She quietly gave it all. The next day Raheel demanded her jewellery, but she gave it without any argument, wanting to make him happy.

Then came another shock.

Naeema had looked forward to getting married and leaving her job at the bank but her husband refused to let her quit the job. She then learnt that he didn’t earn and she would be the one feeding him. Her family were unaware of this as they had been told that he had a job and earned well.

She continued working, and giving him all her earnings, fulfilling his desires, thinking life would get better one day. Instead, things got worse. She discovered that Raheel was a drug addict and he would come home late at night and brutally rape her. She bore the pain without complaint. He soon started demanding things like a car, motorbike and property from her parents, and beat her when she refused to convey his demands to them.

After one particularly painful bout of physical and sexual torture, she returned to her parent’s house only to discover after some days that she was pregnant. She immediately assumed that having a baby would save her from further torture. Her parents were happy, thinking she would go back and live happily with her husband. Her father gifted the husband with a motorbike and he took her back.

Despite her pregnancy, Raheel continued to come home late, rape her and demand things. Her health deteriorated and soon she learnt that she had lost her baby. Continuous painful rapes had resulted in a miscarriage. She decided again to leave her husband, the man responsible for killing her baby, but going back to her parents was not easy. She found it impossible to withstand the misery in their eyes. When her mother-in-law came to bring her back, promising that her son would change, her parents agreed to send her back. Naeema went along with their decision.

Unexpectedly after her return, Raheel seemed like a changed man. But it didn’t last long. Everything started becoming what it was. The late night sexual harassment, demands for money, the beatings. After a month or two, she was pregnant again.

In her fifth month Naeema quit the job and her mother took her home and looked after her. She gave birth to a beautiful girl. However, Raheel wasn’t a part of the happiness since he was in jail for being involved in a gang rape case. Soon he was released and happy with the baby, Naeema was ready to forgive and forget. Raheel was good to the baby but his behaviour towards Naeema continued to be abusive. Unwilling to see her baby growing up in that environment, Naeema finally decided to leave Raheel. She filed a case and got a divorce, but he wasn’t ready to divorce her. He filed a case for the custody of the baby but fortunately, the court assigned custody of the baby to Naeema. Even though she had legally won the rights to keep her baby, her ex-husband began terrorising her and her family day and night saying it was his right to see the child whenever he wanted. Sick and tired of continuous harassment, Naeema’s family decided to return the daughter to the father.

Now, Raheel is again in jail for a rape case and for his abusive and threatening behaviour to Naeema and her family. His intimidating behaviour has reached to a point where he is now threatening to throw acid on Naeema’s face once he gets out of jail. But that’s the furthest of Naeema’s worries as all she can think about is her baby living with her sister-in-law. She wants to fight for her daughter’s custody but has no support from her family. They say they want to get her re-married - which will be easier without the baby. Secondly, they don’t want any kind of contact with the ex-husband. If Naeema gets custody of the baby, she will have to allow Raheel to meet her once in a while - a thought that fills everyone with dread. Everyone - except for Naeema - is ready to give away the baby to get rid of him completely. People try to make her feel better by saying it is fate. Naeema doesn’t call it fate: she calls it injustice. She knows it’s her right to get her daughter back and live a civil life without interference from her ex-husband. She knows it’s her right to be happy. But, the rights of women are something that has been long ignored in our country and there still seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel.

*Names have been changed

The story was originally published in the 'You Magazine' dated 6/14/2011.

Creativity- Gone Forever ???

2011-05-05T23:54:00.002+05:00

“I was born intelligent, but education ruined me”

For years it was just another satirical quote on our public education system which I hardly notice and understood. But, believe me its shadow conceals something deep for which a person needs to uncover the layer of pseudo-intelligentsia from his eyes.

I remember once my cousin brother made an inverted painting of ship when we were still in knickers. He explained that it’s just a normal ship only travelling inside the water. I guess that day he might had been engulfed by soul of innovators behind submarines.

Creativity plays a major role in sharpening the behavior and shaping the future characteristic of a child. Fortunately, we all are born creative. Unfortunately, the refinement process which we undergo in later stages of life kills the basic notion of being creative.

All around the world the public education system is much or more the same; it’s livid and morbid designed only to make us a human machine. Quite amazingly we spend two forth of our life learning how to be perfect and in the process we forget the basic definition of being perfect. Idiotically, our mind is alluded to became captive of the notion that mistakes would result in failures which would subsequently end our life.

How ironic is that? Ask any scientist about the number of failures he met in his career and the answer will astonish even the hardest human being. Creativity might lead to mistakes which may further bring on failures but failures are the only door to invention and discoveries. You cannot find a new way to your home unless you look for alternatives. Following the same path will only lead to same results.

We had a great legacy of Gurukul system of education in our country where students enrolled were being mould according to individual creativity. It never emphasized on creating junks of students who are good for nothing. Unfortunately, in a mad race to out-due our western counterparts we got the system changed and now like rest of the world we too are following a global system of public education, made only to create a new class of clerks in post- industrialization era.

“Success comes from bad experiences and a bad experience comes from failures.”

Today, I felt being deluded when the teacher coordinator rejected a minor project report of not only mine but the whole class citing reasons that were hypothetical. We were asked to look unto her words as axiom and follow the century old regime. Her remarks were quite naïve and pungent when she ordered us to reallocate the font size and modulate the content of the report. It was a serious blow on the creativity of students.

As a matter of fact, the so called brilliant students getting top ranks will one day have to work for a college drop-out who was busy nurturing his creative outlook out of those goosy lectures.

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CSAAM April 2011 : Child Sexual Abuse - the reality

2011-04-13T08:49:00.003+05:00

I don't wish to talk about force here today.
I want to share with everyone, an incident that happened in Singapore right in front of my eyes and I just had to pass by, helpless.

I was going to the Tampines library. I found a school girl, maybe around 14-15 years old, in the arms of a man, and it looked like he was trying to console her...
He was leaning against the library wall, and moving his hands on her behind, one hand in her hair, and he was speaking to her, as if he would be taking care of her. It was so obvious.. that he was trying to trap her using whims and so-called "I know baby, nobody cares for you. I do, do you believe me? I care for you" nonsense.

And I passed the library to buy myself some bubble tea. When I came back, I saw the two going somewhere. A clear cut case of how people can use mind games to trap young teenagers into trusting them so they carry out their unlawful notions.

This incident actually sent shivers in my mind. The worst part was, I could see it happen. I knew what was going on. I understood the modus operandi. I could not do much. I was just a regretful silent spectator. I was in an alien country and I couldn't do much.

BUT, that is besides the point. The point is, how do we protect our kids from such sexual assault that takes shape of a gradual friendly encounter turned into trust and then advantage?

Teenage is a tender age, when mind is like a creeper. Give it support, and it will lean on to it. It will bend as per the support it gets. So also, if a teenager falls prey to mind games of sinister people, it sees no sense and usually starts speaking the same language. That's why it's important to make sure we give our kids the sense of differentiating right from wrong, the risks of mingling with suspicious (read: too sweet for comfort, or friendlier than necessary) people and the actual consequences (yes, everything) of such encounters. Kids need to know facts - albeit the RIGHT facts from the right people and it's important to teach them the facts of life without creating hoo-ha about it, and making it obvious that it is taboo. It is taboo because we choose to make it so. But these times are past such double standards, for there is a lot at stake.

Like the incident I spoke about just now, there are hundreds that go unnoticed and hundreds that result in crime. And targets are kids. Why? Because kids are innocent, gullible and easy to trap. A few more incidents shared with me by acquaintances -

Let's say A went to tuition everyday. The tution was actually at her teacher's home and the teacher's brother one day, took advantage of A and started touching her 'badly'.

B was travelling in a bus. It was too crowded. She suddenly realized that the man standing behind her was trying to lean on to her in an obscene way.

C was visiting a park. It was a Saturday and the park had newly opened. So there was too much crowd. Suddenly she feels a sharp pain on her behind. Taking advantage of the crowd, some pervert had pinched her very hard and she looked around but there were just people everywhere. She did not know who had done it.

How do we stop these incidents from happening?
I think they can not be stopped. But what CAN be done - the best solution to it, is that every school, private of government should have self-defence classes from young age. Self-defence is the best form of defence.

Spreading awareness is also very important.

Teach your kids to always keep their eyes open; to always be alert whenever they are away from your sight. Teach them to use what they have been bestowed with best - their voice. Doesn't hurt to scream out loud. Teach them to share not hide. Never ever build fear of your authority in their hearts, for if you do that, they will never come to you to tell you they are facing some sort of trouble.

And, never trust relatives too. Never trust your kids with your relatives as well. Many times, the worst incidents have happened inside the family.

Plan for a child only if one of you can give full time attention to the child for atleast two years. There was an incident where a couple found their baby in the hands of a street beggar on a traffic signal close to their home. The baby was rented out by the couple's 'trusted' maid for the day while the couple was away. Imagine what kind of risk that is - the baby was drugged so that it slept all the time.

Today, it's a murky world out there. It's difficult to trust anyone. And the safety of kids has become quite a concern. Let's teach them how to be safe.

~
Punam J R
I can be found at my personal blog Dreamz Forever

End Of Authoritarians

2011-03-16T23:10:00.002+05:00

There are two kinds of abstractions, one that exist in mind and the other that are unimaginable. Abstractions imaginable do exist in world apart from those that physically exist. Everything, either physical or abstract, that exists has two faces, one that is beautiful and favorable to some, and the other that is ugly and hostile to others. But such things do exist, which have one face either beautiful or ugly, which either favors you, in all their state, or is against you. For instance education has one beautiful face that benefits all and illiteracy has one ugly face that favors none...

Our existing political systems in some way have a similar story. Authoritarian form of government is such thing that favors not even authoritarians themselves. I am saying something to which authoritarians in power would never agree. But Doug Flahaut’s piece on his ...classmate Saif Qaddafi reinforces my statement in which he analysis Saif Qaddafi’s speech as, “…What I saw during the 40-minute speech was two Saifs at war with each other… Saif undoubtedly sensed the gravity of the position he was taking and the possibility that he could be tried at The Hague.” It is clear from the above that Saif Qaddafi defeated Saif-Al-Islam at war leaving him to his fate. It is clear that a liberal minded Saif-Al-Islam could not stand in front of repressive Saif Qaddafi. It is free from doubt that leadership in an authoritarian system that he inherited from his father silenced a liberal voice and his fate took him to the weakest position that even if he is alive somewhere inside his existence cannot make difference. When the ruler of the soul Saif Qaddafi was warning Libyans: A stable Libya under my father is better than the short, nasty and brutish alternative—a life of civil war, Saif-Al-Islam was expecting his father, an authoritarian ruler, to regret by saying: You should have listened to me and implemented reforms.

Not all will agree but Self rule can bring nothing to a person but money. Total or partial authoritarians are beyond money same as Qaddafi but that did not make it possible for Saif to get ruled by his own, Saif-Al-Islam’s, qualities. That did not help him defeat Saif Qaddafi. That did not let Saif-Al-Islam live. Saif, for whom there was no reason to write a thesis that did not have practical applications, promised committees where “everyone can agree on new laws and a constitution,” a unanimity that he himself had called inapplicable at LSE. He is well aware of his losses, he is aware that his money that the system could only shower cannot save him from trail at The Hague. He is aware of what this authoritarian system has brought to Libyans and himself.

History has climaxed Qadafis’ fate similar to dictators that have passed more or less the same period of impeachment, whether he is Pakistan’s dictator or the dictator of Tunisia or Egypt. All partial or total authoritarian rulers suffer same situation of daydream till their last breadth after history ends their period of heavenly life. Here with partial I mean those who demand democracy while authoritatively ruling their political parties. This restricts a person’s qualities, degrades one’s interests and affects lifestyle. This hardly encourages the theory of attaining independent life according to one’s own choice. And if the interest is to become a leader it avoids competition, hence repealing hard work and education, and so people are deprived of a true leader. This imposes restrictions on one’s qualities, on capacity to think independently limiting the room space and hence influencing decisions that may be referred as ‘a conservative decision by a liberal’ after so many factors affecting them. No matter how much they condemn authoritarianism the system triggers their repressive soul that overcome a hero within them and the only left repressive soul dies with the end of heavenly days. Saif’s repressive soul will die the day his last in Libya leaving him, who’s both souls, would weaken then, to laugh at himself for the rest of his life.

This is only what a self-interested authoritarian system can bless mankind with. It has just one ugly face that already troubles nations and ends at troubling authoritarian leaders. It is a kind of selfishness that lessons life to sufferers and ruins life of those being selfish. I safely conclude that those who seek favor may end in destruction. So may I call here self-interested authoritarians naïve who are running after devastation of which they are unaware?

Rural Entrepreneurship

2011-03-15T00:34:00.000+05:00

While researching over the topic I found “Entrepreneurs” are people who create and grow enterprises and “Entrepreneurship” is the process through which entrepreneurs create and grow enterprises. I guess the definition above suits best for a management class or the government files. Personally I feel, “Entrepreneurs” are people who have the passion and zeal to bring a qualitive change in the society through their mind boggling ideas. And, “Entrepreneurship” is a process or more of a pathway which they take to fulfill their dreams.

More than half of the Indian populace live in villages. Indian villages have a huge hidden potential in the fields of traditional arts and crafts, food industry and the like. Most of the rural households are involved in some or the other kind of agricultural service provider units. India's rural economy is primarily agricultural based, but the rapid rise in its population with consequent pressure on land has led the planners to lay greater emphasis on industrial development.

Rural Entrepreneurship may focus on areas like food processing which may include variety of products from various sectors comprising agriculture, horticulture, plantation, animal husbandry and fisheries & marine products. Another area which may be looked into is fruit based beverages. Products like syrups and squashes of orange, mango, lime, pineapple, grape, apple, etc. besides their jam and jelly are very popular among the masses.

The best example of a rural entrepreneurship may include that of an Oil industry. Crushing of oil seeds to obtain edible oil for human consumption has been an age-old village industry in India. Another example of rural entrepreneurship may include the pottery, which is traditional industry of rural India, providing employment to many artisans.

But, one question might be creeping in your mind. That is, what good rural entrepreneurs are doing for the development of our country India? For answering this question we must first understood that there is a huge difference in the standard of life between the two India, let us call them with two different names to make the demarcation easy. The urban, which is more developed, can be called in as the India and its rural counterpart which needs an urgent development can be called as Bharat. So, rural entrepreneurs are doing their bit in order to fill the divide between the India and the Bharat.

Policies like micro-finance are filling the empty pockets of villagers to start-up their own small scale businesses besides giving them a financial security. Rural Entrepreneurship has the power of making rural populace self sufficient which may help in reducing migration of people from villages to cities, thus reducing congestion of resources in cities and towns.

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Education Outreach as a Weapon Against Terrorism in Pakistan

2011-03-10T14:12:00.002+05:00

Education
is often considered the yardstick of a country’s progress and is one of several indicators used to gauge a developing country’s measure of progress. However, for Pakistan, a key regional player, this is unfortunately not the case. Where industry, GDP and per capita income are often cited as indicators of growth, education is given the cold shoulder. This is an issue that Pakistan, and the international community at large, can not afford to ignore as Pakistan is at the forefront of the War on Terror and shares one of the most volatile borders in the region. It’s premature scholastic demise is bound to tear at its fragile system and slowly bring it to its knees. Continually ostracizing education from the national agenda in this manner will only aggravate these under lying issues that Pakistan is attempting to address with its active role against its home grown militants and the war on terror. The spill over effect of this unwillingness to address a fundamental problem is bound to spread beyond just Pakistan’s borders and is poised to affect the socioeconomic peace and stability of many regional stake holders. A fact check should help bring the magnitude of the issue at hand into focus.

Pakistan is currently embroiled in the War on Terror on its home front and faces increasing unrest in many key regions of the country where militancy has slowly started to take root. While militia outfits were previously limited to the Federally Administered Tribal Areas (FATA) and the western Balochistan regions, they have now started to spread their influence to other parts of the country as well, namely southern Punjab, interior Sindh, central Khyber-Pakhtunkhwa (KP) and parts of Gilgit-Baltisitan. The common denominator that all these disparate regions share is that, collectively, they are some of Pakistan’s most under developed areas, lacking even the most basic infrastructure facilities – including basic health care and effective primary education. As of December 26th, 2010 alone saw 53 suicide bombings; while most of these can be traced back to one of these regions, 37 of these attacks took place in the highly volatile Pashtun belt of FATA and Khyber-Pakhtunkhwa – originating, again, from the under developed FATA region. The most alarming fact, at this point, is thatnot only is this number comparable to that of Iraq and Afghanistan, the effective strike rate and magnitude of these bombings are also similar to those of these war torn countries.
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A few more fact checks will help put things in perspective. As of 2010, Pakistan allocates approximately 2.9% of its annual GDP towards the education sector, putting it at the 153rd rank internationally from among 186 countries with published statistics – well below most developed and developing nations and above a few under developed countries. For comparison’s sake, Ghana, Sudan, Ethiopia, Tonga and Swaziland all rank higher than Pakistan. However, this figure can really only be appreciated once we realize that education spending is concentrated in the secondary and post secondary education sectors in medium to large cities with considerable financial and social activity taking place – regions where literacy rates already hover between ~70-75%. This means that agrarian villages and the more remote areas with little to no infrastructure development beyond the basic water and electricity facilities – regions which actually require primary education facilities for societal progress – are relegated to the bottom rung of the priority list.

A better interpretation of the above information can be gleaned if we take note of the fact that Pakistan’s self reported literacy rate is 50% with a 36% female literacy rate and a 63% literacy rate among males – the second lowest after Afghanistan in the region. Another self reported statistic states that the average school life expectancy for Pakistani students, from primary to tertiary education, is 7 years: 8 years for males and 6 years for females, ignoring the individual literacy rates that is. The qualifying statistic of these values reports that while 60% of females and 72% of males are enrolled in primary education, only 60% of these students graduate. So, whereas 60% of the enrolled primary level students graduate, only 28% of these females and 37% of the males go on to continue secondary level education. Unfortunately, these are still not the most alarming statistics as the sample universe of these surveys is only children of school going age; the most alarming statistics actually state that out of a population of 176 million people, only 5% continue to pursue a tertiary level education. It should be noted here that despite such a small effective work force, shockingly, Pakistan still suffers from an unemployment rate of 14% as of 2009.

What is even more unfortunate is that the full impact of these statistics cannot be realized unless their effect on Pakistan’s societal and economic progress is not understood. Literacy, in these surveys, is defined as the ability to read and write for people 15 and over. It must be noted here that the yard stick for the ability to read and write is often relegated to being able to construct and comprehend simple written expressions in Urdu and bear no meaning, whatsoever, on the level of skills or the quality of education being imparted. An accurate idea of these can be had from the fact that a large majority of these schools, especially primary and secondary schools, lack the basic education facilities of books, stationary, classrooms, black boards and furniture so much so that the reported student to teacher ratio of the entire education system, including chartered universities, is 41. Here, it can be deduced, to a certain degree of accuracy, that while a sizable percentage of the school going population receives at least primary education, the quality of this education is poor and few, if any, vocational skills are developed as a result. Consequently, only the small 5% reported enrolled University students and a very small percentage of the population with up to a secondary level of education continue to become a productive and a progressive part of the work force that can further assist the Pakistani economy to make the shift from an agrarian to a manufacturing and, eventually, services based industry.

It must be noted here that a driving motive behind Pakistan’s war against extremism is to root out the regressive societal values that are taking hold in the rural and under developed regions of the country. However, the underlying cause behind this increasingly disturbing social behavior – i.e. the lack of basic education – is constantly being ignored. Unless the masses are encouraged to actively pursue at least a primary level of education, this cannot change. The war might root out the fundamentalist core, but the change in ideology that needs to be brought out to prevent such activism from surfacing again cannot be accomplished unless a gainful education is not provided to the masses. This, at the moment, is the biggest challenge that Pakistan, as a nation, faces. If the bare minimum of Primary education is provided to the lower echelons of the Pakistani population, 24% of a total of which are below the poverty line with a large borderline percentage, these people can gain access to information that they would otherwise be kept from – their reliance on central figures of authority for directional information, the major reason for the continually regressive social values, can be broken. It is pivotal to break this link as continued reliance on this phenomenon, not very dissimilar from the system that has been in place in Afghanistan and many key conflict regions in Africa like Sudan, if Pakistan is to break out of the alternating cycle of social and economic rebuilding and disintegration.

At this point, it is important to realize that whereas countries with similar economic and social histories like China and India are successfully making the shift from agriculture based economies to manufacturing and services based industries, Pakistan’s continued failure to do so has resulted in considerable social and economic deterioration. The main reason behind this, besides failure to formulate key economic and industrial policies, has been Pakistan’s inability to produce both an effective work force and a conducive environment with viable opportunities for said work force, resulting in educational deteriorating standards and an unfortunate brain drain. The fact that the standard of public education, the only form of education accessible to the masses, has continued to deteriorate over the years has only strengthened the perception among these target audience that the years spent within the education system do not contribute towards a gainful employment. As a result, instead of educating at least two or three out of the 7 or 8 members of a house hold, all members contribute to the active income of the family from the earliest age, the minimum 6 years that Primary education requires is seen as lost potential income. This mind set needs to be changed if the literacy rate is to be raised and a productive work force is to be formed; unless this is done, Pakistan can not move beyond the stagnant agrarian economy which it has become synonymous with. Unfortunately, despite the fact that Pakistan is considered a developing country and is a key global player, it shares these features economic and social features with the under developed, struggling and conflict ridden economies of the world, including some of the least developed African nations.

Changing this bleak outlook is going to require a considerable investment on the Government’s part as social, educational and infrastructure reforms will need to be brought about and a significant reallocation of the fiscal budget will need to be directed towards this cause. Regrettably, Pakistan cannot adopt a foreign model for this restructuring as its social and economic condition is unique to itself and the colonial model that has been a leftover from the British rule is not only inefficient but is also highly unsuitable to today’s unique conditions. It is imperative that the proper infrastructure and the conducive environment required to realize such progress is provided before any tangible gains can be seen. To this end, short and long term policies need to be formulated from the ground up to address these grass root level short comings while maintaining a realistic perspective on the current sociopolitical set up. The challenge at this point in time is not only formulating a social framework for developing the requisite infrastructure but also its implementation under the prevalent hostile conditions.

Consequently, the route that the Government needs to adopt towards achieving these goals is one with a two pronged strategy where it simultaneously addresses the trust issues that have developed in the lower strata of the society and successfully lays the infrastructure necessary to provide a quality Primary and Secondary education. The first step towards achieving these goals is to emphasize the necessity of a basic education to the masses. Since this is the biggest existing trust deficit among the less privileged with respect to education, it needs to be tackled on a priority basis, especially in the less developed regions of the country. Whereas in southern Punjab the emphasis needs to be that a basic education can provide a better means, in the form of providing technical and vocational skills, to a gainful employment, in the FATA region the emphasis needs to be on the fact that even a primary level of education brings about a substantial improvement in the quality of life in the form of better accessibility to information, ease of integration into other regional social set ups and increased independence of thought. To ensure that Primary and Secondary education is viewed in a favorable light in these socially and economically remote regions, the Government needs to step beyond just this mere rhetoric and convince these people by effective utilization of resources to help these people realize a real world scenario where even such a basic level of education helps them to progress vertically in society.

Unfortunately, this can only be done with a concerted effort on the Government’s part with a significantly higher allocation of the fiscal budget towards education to successfully mobilize the necessary resources to realize such ambitious goals. It is important, for instance, that Primary educational facilities that provide technical and vocational skills alongside a basic education course should be set up in regions adjacent to cities like Bahawalpur, Sukkur and D.G Khan. It is also very important that appropriate job opportunities are created alongside these educational facilities to underscore the significance of the technical and educational skills being imparted at such institutes. Similarly, it is very important that in addition to setting up effective Primary and Secondary educational facilities in the region, FATA is also integrated into the rest of the Khyber-Pakhtunkhwa (KP) province on an equal opportunity basis. Unless this is done, the people of FATA will not be able to realize any tangible gains from a Primary, and then later a Secondary, education as the current tribal system, under which the region is run does not benefit from education; however, the KP province, where employment opportunities and social standing have a direct statistical correlation with the level of education received, highlights its importance manifold.

The implementation of such aggressive proposals require that extensive infrastructure be laid down before any measurable progress can be recorded. This infrastructure requirement goes beyond just the conventional, yet still lacking, facilities of furniture, stationary, books and appropriate buildings. It calls for

extensive teacher training programs
detailed course revisions
salary revisions for such schools to provide due incentive for external participation
sustained awareness programs under a continued community involvement policy
the setting up of small cottage industries in these regions with significant direct market access
a transparent and efficient system to carry all of this out.

Unfortunately, for Pakistan – a struggling economy- this means extensive capital and labor investment in these currently economically non-contributive regions, especially in the education and services sectors – long considered Pakistan’s traditional weak points. Fortunately, for Pakistan, this ensures development in key social sectors traditionally considered the weak links towards its path to progress. This means that where implementing these ambitious measures will require a significant financial and social contribution from the Government and the community, it will result in significant long term progress for the region and the country. Consequently, sincerely pursuing a twenty year plan towards the social and economic uplift of these regions will not only result in an improved literacy rate, it will also result in a more productive and active work force. This process will create gainful employment opportunities and encourage the growth of SMEs and new industries in these under developed regions – providing the required economic stimulus to such economically stagnant areas to turn them into socially and economically independent units that contribute towards the country’s economy.

Therefore, whereas the initial goal of such an aggressive and ambitious strategy would be education outreach to regions where it has low accessibility, the means to the end ensure that, regardless of the route taken to address the problem, significant benefits can be had from just attempting to formulate and implement such policies. A strong statistical correlation between the education and poverty levels has already been established above, increased education and the implementation of aggressive education policies should, at the very least, lower the poverty levels in the country whilst creating both greater employment opportunities and a more able work force. Consequently, with lesser people below the poverty line and reduced unemployment, accessibility to Secondary and Higher education should automatically rise as per capita income rises and reliance on all members of the household to earn gradually falls. This should have a slow but pronounced effect on the social set up in these regions where education is currently viewed as an extravagance instead of a necessity as, with time, education will come to be viewed as a useful tool towards social progress. In such regions, like central Balochistan and Interior Sindh, this is a prerequisite if social reform is to be brought about as a majority of the households in this region comprise of low income families. Once these communities are put on an equal social and economic footing with the rest of the country, the change in mind set that is required to help these communities integrate into the rest of the social fabric will automatically follow. It is important to realize that a notable reason behind the civil and social unrest, resulting in the socially regressive values that are taking hold in these under developed areas, is the discriminating lack of social and economic attention that these areas have received over the past few decades. The infrastructure required for education outreach to take place in these areas is a key factor in their social and economic uplift; it is the missing catalyst that can mobilize these communities to actively pursue both education and economic and social progress.

While the above stated analyses also applies to FATA, it is important to note that FATA’s case, as the region at the crux of Pakistan’s war against terrorism, is different from that of the other under developed areas in the country; its conditions are unique only to itself. Due to this, the policies devised for the social and economic uplift of the other key under developed regions will need to be altered and adapted to FATA’s conditions; the purpose behind this is to not only bring FATA at par with the rest of the country but to free it of the extremist strain and the fundamental mind set that have taken hold over it. Whereas this is only a budding seed in interior Sindh and Southern Punjab, it is a mature threat in the FATA. Consequently, special care needs to be taken to implement a socioeconomic policy that does not produce arresting results but instead, has subtle but significant effects on the social setup of the area. For this purpose, the Government should ensure that social and economic opportunities, like employment and scholarships, are provided to FATA’s candidates on a priority basis; it also needs to encourage increased social and economic interaction between FATA and its adjacent areas. Unless FATA is integrated into it’s surrounding communities, its role and identity as an indigenous body will continue to prevent any education outreach to take place, and consequently, prevent any social or economic uplift to take place as well.

It is important to realize that whereas education is vital to the social and economic growth of any key under developed region, Pakistan’s conditions do not allow for easy accessibility to this commodity uniformly across the country. While a concerted and sincere effort towards education outreach is bound to solve these problems, the infrastructure that needs to be laid down before any such mediums are utilized are also equally important. Pakistan’s case is unique only in that its problems have fast escalated beyond easily manageable levels due to prolonged apathy to the issues faced by these regions. On the world’s stage, Pakistan is a key player and with its uneducated masses left at the mercy of the religious factions, a potential time bomb ticking away until the time is ripe.

Unless pronounced efforts are made at this stage, Pakistan’s downward social and economic spiral is bound to catch up to it’s 7-9 economic and cultural capitals which have managed to stay a step ahead of these issues. Once this happens, the relative calm that these cities have been able to project will slowly give way to the real under lying issues infecting the social and economic setup of the country – only, by then it will have been too late to address them anymore.

As published on Future Challenges and Rabab Khan.

Commercialization of Festivals

2011-03-08T18:59:00.000+05:00

My inbox is flooded with messages telling me about my level of ignorance. They all have one thing in common: they all describe the month of February as the month of love! I’m yet to make out what are the pre-requisite criteria of dignifying a month with such a stature. Earlier, I was told that the month of January should be celebrated as the month of ‘new hope’. An interesting thing to point out here that most of the messages I received were forwarded ones, pointing to some or the other organizations having a commercial interest.

Commercialization of festivals is the direct result of globalization. Two questions might be creeping in your mind- firstly, how commercialization is related with globalization? And secondly, why are festivals being marketed in such a large scale? Before going into further detail I must mention that this article concerns not only about festivals having a religious backing but also with festivals invented post industrialization like Valentine’s Day.

Globalization brought with itself a close nexus among the world different organizations. Post liberalization, suppose an Indian firm having a business in greeting cards was now directly interacting with a USA firm having a business in bouquets; both the firms supported each other logistically. Now the overseas department of that USA firm was maintained by its Indian Counterpart, same was true with the Indian firm. This in all broadens the scope of commercialization of festivals. It further heightened the belief that why not Indians replicate the same success which their counterparts did in USA.

Also, liberalization brought with itself a new breed of entrepreneurs who wanted to experiment with the shores still untouched. Companies started giving out sales and offers like Diwali Dhamaka and Christmas Bonanza. But, Valentine Day with its family (Friendship Day, etc) was still an alien to us.

Then all of a sudden companies migrated to a new theme. They started advertising their product around youths. More and more youth centric slogans started peeping out. Somewhere in the middle companies manufacturing Chocó’s, soft drinks, greeting cards, etc. saw an untimed opportunity floating in it. It leads to the emergence of festivals like Valentine, Friendship, Mother, etc.

Our society accepted most of them like Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, etc. But, few others like Valentine’s Day and Friendship Day are still looked at as somewhat defying ethics. People supporting such festivals and their commercialization claim to have a wider and broader thinking. They call themselves pseudo-secular. On contrary, people not supporting such festivals and their commercialization talks about the degradation of cultural and moral conduct which is brought in by such festivals.

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Image source: Google Images

Our Attitude Towards Our 'Helpers'

2011-03-08T03:30:00.004+05:00

Servants, nannies, cooks, gardeners, gate keepers etc., how do we treat them all? Do we really think they are humans and should be given an equal place like any other living person? A very common scene when we go out to eat in any restaurant is that a family sitting on a table enjoying their food,and somebody sitting alone on another table either having food or just babysitting the mischievous kids. Don’t you ever think how do they feel sitting on the next table feeding your kids? How would you feel if you are made to do this? Not at all good, I am sure.

Many people give an excuse that people like ‘these’ deserve it. God made them like this or it’s their own fault that they are illiterate. There sure is a percentage of people who don’t study themselves but then there are many who cannot afford the expenses of getting educated. The thing is God did give them what He wanted but then ordered US, the privileged ones, to take care of them. God asked us to give them a fair share of our income and that’s not just like that; it’s in return of the services they provide.

What is our general attitude towards the people who work for us? I have never heard a living person praising his/her servant. What we always hear or say is what he does NOT do. Never heard anybody saying my servant is really good, helps me a lot, comes on time etc.. Worse than that is, whenever you find anything missing at your place; you always blame it on them. Why do we always think that the poor will always steal and do bad things? Why don’t we take them as normal human beings? Many of them are much more honest than their masters who sit in the comfort of their offices and bribe or do other things like that to earn more money.

Let us think for a second, what if all these people stop working for us. Will a man who ridicules his servant be able to ‘make’ his wife do all the daily chores what his servant used to do for him? Or will a woman will want to stay home, give a pause to her kitty parties and do all the stuff? If you think of all the possible things you will HAVE to do once all these domestic servants give up on you, you sure will be thankful to them. Accept the fact that they are more like helpers to us all.

There sure is an international labour's day but did we ever realise who enjoys that international holiday? Its US, we are the ones who sit home on that day. We are the labour to somebody too, I agree, but then they are too. Shouldn't they be given a day off too? Most of us make them do more work than any other day because that's when you are home and can make them do it, yourself. They work harder than most of us. They deserve it more.

It’s not just that the servants are verbally humiliated; many domestic servants are, physically and sexually, abused too. It just does not happen in Asia, but everywhere. It is a very common practice in the Middle East that the servants are ‘imported’ from their countries and then kept in the countries forcefully. They are not allowed to back unless their masters allow them. They are not only beaten up by the adults but by the little kids too. Some of the stories of the worst torturing come out but many go unnoticed.

There are many things we can do for them. First and the foremost is, STOP thinking they are any less then you. They are equally human as you are, or maybe more. After that, you can help them now and again financially. We all know what we pay them as their monthly salary does nothing much for them. We can get them new dresses on special occasions or just give them extra money so that they don’t feel less privileged. We can get their children married. We all say they are illiterate, but then who is to be blamed for that? We have money, we can get our children educated from any institute we want but they can’t. Most of us can finance their children’s education quite easily, but we don’t. Did you ever think why? Maybe because we think that the ‘servant’s kid’ will grow up one day to compete ‘our kid’? Why don’t we make our kids competent enough instead of snubbing other’s children?

Do you think that the things or money you have today will remain with you forever? Is there any surety that it will? I don’t think there is any. The bread winner of the family who you are so proud of today can, God forbid, die or get paralyzed. Or if not that, floods, earthquakes or any other natural calamity can wash away all of it for you. You never know where that can take you. If we look around, we get to see many who, had everything yesterday, are forced to beg and steal today. Be careful when you degrade others, you can’t ever say when it can get it to you. There is no guarantee to anything. If you have everything today, you never know you end up with nothing at all tomorrow. Walk in their shoes a few miles to know how worst it hurts.

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Where Are You Right Now?

2011-02-16T19:49:00.000+05:00

I welcome you to the age of communication, an age where communication has revolutionized. Welcome to the cyber age, where practically all modes of communication have been overcome by the wonder that we call the Internet. We have been eagerly waiting for a time such as this, where information is the new name replacement for knowledge. This age talks of data, numbers, statistics, figures, facts, information and communication.

I focus here on a personal front. We’re sitting at the dinner table and I see my younger brother logged onto some messenger on his phone. He’s here, but he really isn’t here, is he? I need to have the kind of mobile phone that caters all my basic information needs on the go. I need to update my twitter ever so often; the more the tweets, the more followers I will have. Tweet, tweet, tweet, and I almost forget what was going on around me. Facebook has become an essential linking tool for friends and family, usually that the geographically apart. You know what happened to your distant cousin on a so and so date and what their nasty aunt had to say about the whole thing. Your friend updates a wedding photo album of his friend and yet you can see all that too. You don’t know them but you still take out time to go through the whole album before you decide it’s just a waste of time. Capture a moment in a photo and blog about it just like that! You come home after a nine hour office duty but your email keeps coming in, updating, updating, updating. You’re finally home, yet your mind is still in the office. Your family suffers from your distraction.

If there are so many tools available that help us stay connected, why does each and every one of us feel disconnected? I’m on the internet 24/7, I stay connected with my friends and family who are sitting away from me, but I’m too busy to look around and see the people sitting right next to me. When I find a special moment I just have to tweet about it and by the time I’m done with that, the moment has slipped away. We’re in constant communication with the world, but I feel that for that kind of communication, we are constantly giving a part of us away. We keep focusing out into the world and forget the little things around us. I believe this is exactly the reason why so many youngsters among us are frustrated and distressed.

There is no outlet that’s close to nature. What has happened to good old traditions of having a proper family time or that of outdoor activities? Sitting in front of the computer night and day, or constantly looking into your cell phone screen and tapping is giving us nothing but a tired mind and an unhealthy body. Not that I do not acknowledge the positive aspects of everything technology has blessed us with, but there is no sense in going overboard with everything.

Practice solitude every now and then; it’s a wonderful way to recollect yourself. The race is long and hard, you cannot win it with a tired mind. Make sure you take out time for yourself. Turn off that mobile phone for some time, take a break from the constant updates from the 100-something people you may or may not know. Give your time and focus to your family bonding. It can do wonders.

Be present in the here and now. There’s so much to take in, so many moments to appreciate, and so much to enjoy.

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First published at the perfect line

The Divorce Effect!!

2011-02-12T13:22:00.001+05:00

This is not what she asked for. This is not what she was destined for. This is not what she was expecting from her life.

From a determined successful girl of western society to a simple girl from east, there comes a time in life when every girl dreams about getting married. Sooner or later in their lives, they fancy about meeting their perfect life partner and spending a PERFECT life with them.

And then, the most awaited day comes with lots of awaiting dreams and prayers to be heard. Everything seems as PERFECT as she wished for. Days start passing quickly and then, all of a sudden, even before she knows, she finds herself all alone. She finds herself in a situation she never thought about even in her worst nightmare and gradually, she starts to accept the harsh truth of her life - she has been divorced!

Divorce - The word itself is enough to shake a person's heart then think about those who are actually going through this dilemma. How difficult it would be for her to accept the fact that the person she loved with all her heart, for whom she left her home her family has left her. How ruthless that person would be. I am not saying that all divorces and separations take place just because of men. No, in some cases, women are also as guilty as men. But I would like to highlight those innocent women who have to suffer from this lifetime punishment. Unfortunately, these women are in majority. The reasons of divorce could be anything for example adultery, bad behavior, desertion, mental instability or mental illness, differences in perceptions, temperaments, educations, background etc of either partner. Even if not divorced, women have to suffer from the domestic violence like physical, sexual and mental abuse, intimidation, stalking and humiliation by husband. The list does not stop here; she is also constantly tortured by her in laws. She is not allowed to visit her parents; she is bound to stay at home and ought to do all the house chores forcefully all by herself. Still these women silently tolerate this torment, just for the sake of either saving their marital life or for their children.

Unfortunately, children are the ones most affected by divorce, in fact, more than their parents. One of many reasons is that they need both their mother and father equally in their lives. They love them a lot and are scared to lose any of them and thus, after separation they have to live with only one of them. They suffer mentally, emotionally and sometimes physically because of the separation of their parents. This causes the inferiority complexes in them especially when they see other children happy with their family.

In many cases the husband’s family keeps the children. As they know that a mother's weakness is her children hence, she’s not allowed to meet them. Most husbands, with or without the custody of his children, remarry other women. No matter how hard she tries, a step mother can never give the love of a real mother to those children. On the other hand, it rarely happens that divorced women get married again and are accepted by her in laws.

What is the future of these women and their children? The debate on this topic can take days and even a book can be written on its causes, reasons and results, but the question remains the same. Why does it have to happen? Sometimes it is a good decision but most of the time it's not. Why to take such stand and destroy so many lives when it could be resolved by mutual agreement? There are many campaigns going on for this cause, which is a good thing. Majority of them are in favor of women rights. It has now become a story of every second family and unfortunately it is increasing day by day.

It’s very easy to say and write on this issue but how far are they implemented in our society is the point of concern. I really hope that one day people will understand the true meaning of this pure and spiritual relationship and would respect their partners as much as they can. Because to make a make relationship work, compromises are required from the both sides.

Blood Diamond Trade

2011-02-07T23:24:00.000+05:00

Diamonds aren’t forever!

Don’t be amazed, you read it right.

Diamonds aren’t forever! Just look at your Diamond ring for once before moving ahead.

Do you feel anything? Is it the feeling of Love? Or a sign of prosperity?

If so, than I’m sorry, you will again have to give it a thought after reading this post.

Two-third of the world diamonds are extracted in Africa. Blood diamonds commonly known as the conflict diamonds are the diamonds which are mined in a conflict zone and which are used to finance an insurgency. Blood diamond Trade is usually carried out in parts of central and southern African countries which have vast reserves of diamonds but are politically unstable. The countries falling in the region are being tormented by years of civil wars among various war lords and its people. They are the third world countries where industrialization is an alien word, making the standard of living lowest in the world.

In Angola and Sierra Leone, war diamonds ( another name for conflict diamonds) continue to fund the rebel groups which are acting in contrary to the international community's objectives of restoring peace in the region.

People don’t have much to do in this part of the world and are being gripped under the clutches of poverty. From time immortal they are being used as a slave. They are made to work in the horrifying conditions in the mines. Also, the people aren’t left with a choice. In-order to earn a living they succumb to the pressure of working in such horrendous conditions. It’s extremely hard to work in a lode without the proper machinery and prerequisite skills. The unskilled laborers are forced to work for more than 16 hours at a stretch without food and other basic amenities.

As the trade is illegal, sophisticated machinery and security of the miners are seldom given a thought. Laborers are given just a penny for extracting a diamond of more than a thousand dollar value. Mostly, laborers are teenagers as the elders get engrossed away with serious diseases and die early.

A movie on this subject with the same name as of the article brought in many human organizations to raise their voice against the ill-practice. World organizations serious concerns led United Nation passed few resolutions to curb the Blood Diamond Trade, lowering the magnitude of trade. But, yet more is to be done in-order to completely stop it. UN should strive hard in bringing a political normalcy in the countries related with Blood Diamond Trade, which could subsequently pave the way for industrialization and modernization.

Once diamonds are brought to market, their origin is difficult to trace and once polished, they can no longer be identified. So, it may happen that the diamond you bought comes from the Blood Diamond Trade, killing many of those innocent Africans who died extracting it.

Image source 1: Google

Image source 2: Google

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Enhance Creativity in Kids

2011-02-05T08:17:00.005+05:00

The era we are living in is the era of competition. We all are striving hard to win, win some race that even we can’t figure out. If we think of it things always were like this. Humans are always after one another. We don’t really know why we want to win from our colleague, neighbor or a close relative; but we want to. We want to move ahead, reach to that level where nobody ever did. Children these days are under more pressure when compared to the people before. What parents couldn't achieve, they want their kids to accomplish. In this race for the fittest we never want our kids to waste their time to explore themselves.

Be it painting, drawing, sketching, composing beautiful musical notes, writing a soul touching poem or a prose; there is no living person who doesn't have the sense to create. It’s just that some talents need to be groomed and discovered and some ooze out of you automatically. Every baby is born with a talent. As he grows up, we try harder to crush that talent and force him to be what we want him to be. To be very honest, none of us wants our kids to excel in any field related to art. We always want them to grow up to be a doctor or an engineer or an accountant.

Art is a definite form of expression. Anger, happiness, excitement, disappointment, rejection and what not; they all can be expressed by any form of art. Children face all these at some time or the other when they are introduced to the real world. They get a better way to let out these negative and positive emotions once they know how to do it the creative way. Creativity always helps to keep the mental and at times physical health at a balance. It is medically proved that the kids who are appreciated to create things, no matter how ridiculous, grow up to be more intelligent. Their vision gets broader. They see and achieve what others can’t. They grow up to own a more balanced personality.

Every kid is born with a different temperament. Some kids are hyper active others cool and calm, there are many who are aggressive, some like expressing their feelings other like keeping all it to themselves. We need to figure out how we can make use of their positive and negative energies. Most of them can be helped out through art. Discover what your kid is good at. Encourage him to do what he likes doing. If he wants to take it to the professional level, let him. Getting into the fields like these is tougher when compared to gaining a degree in medicine or accounts, we understand, but not impossible. Don’t be afraid that your kid will lose. Give him all the confidence. If a kid has a passion to do it, he will strive hard to achieve it.

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Keep The Promise!

2011-01-29T20:34:00.003+05:00

Some months back, I had the chance to read a book on AIDS. It’s called “A Place for Kathy” by Henry Denker. This book was an eye opener. It’s a lovely story, something that’ll definitely touch something very deep in each and every one of us. It’s about a 12 year old girl, Kathy Cameron, whose hemophiliac father, Kip Cameron, died because of AIDS. Kathy and her mother were finally managing a normal life when years after, Kathy’s mother, Grace Cameron, is diagnosed of having HIV. Grace is determined not to hurt her bright and sensitive daughter with this bad news. She sees the way Kathy has matured earlier than girls of her age because of her father’s death. She decides not to tell until it becomes absolutely necessary, which in this case would be the discovery that her HIV has matured to AIDS. Sadly enough guys, it so happens that her HIV has grown to AIDS. Thus starts this heartwarming and touching tale of a mother who knows she won’t be there for long and before she dies, she has to find a loving home for dear Kathy. Kathy turns out to be stronger than her mother had expected. She bravely faces the fact that her mother is going to die soon. Yet she keeps her mother’s spirits high till her very last breath. Apart from the very emotional drama, a lot of medical information has been very beautifully interwoven. Here is some Google search on it.

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HIV (human immunodeficiency virus) is the virus that goes further to cause AIDS (acquired immune deficiency syndrome) which weakens a person’s ability to fight against infections and cancers and other disease. The HIV of a person is said to have matured to AIDS when they develop certain kinds of infections or cancers or when their CD4 cell count is less than 200. CD4 stands for “cluster of differentiation 4”.

Our blood has basically two parts: solid and liquid. The liquid part is made up of plasma whereas the solid part is made up of cells. These cells are of three types: Red Blood Cells, Platelets and White Blood Cells.

Cells have a receptor that allows the HIV cell to bind with it and inject its genetic code in it. This is how HIV cells manage to replicate themselves using the mechanism of CD4 cells, thus, the number of HIV cells that destroy the CD4 cells multiplies. The CD4 cell count is a measure of the strength of a person’s immune system. It can be obtained by a blood test. A healthy person’s CD4 cell count is around 600 to 1500 cells. If this count falls below 200, then it means that the person’s immune system has no longer the strength left to fight and protect against infections, cancers and other ailments. This is the stage when the HIV has grown into AIDS, the final stage of HIV. At this stage, the body is very much vulnerable to diseases and infections. The causes of AIDS are given here.

Symptoms of HIV turning into AIDS:

A fever that won’t go away
Sweating during sleep
Feeling tired all the time without stress or lack of sleep being the reason
Feeling ill all the time
Losing weight
Swollen glands

Some of the Infections that AIDS patients get:

Shortness of breath and difficulty in breathing due to infection in the lungs
Chronic diarrhea
Mental changes and headaches due to fungal infections or tumors in either the brain or the spinal chord
Kaposi’s sarcoma; a skin tumor that looks like dark purple blotches
Severe malnutrition

The impact of AIDS is heart shirking and painful. You will be devastated to see the shape of Africa when it comes to AIDS where, apart from elders, countless children less than 15 years of age are AIDS victims who got it passed on from their parents. Other than that, the number of orphans in Africa continues to increase drastically as more and more people die of AIDS. They say that a picture is worth a thousand words. Click here for a series of photographs on the condition of this continent. I warn you, these pictures are painful to see. I do not mean to upset or disturb you in anyway, but I believe one should have the courage to see this side of the story as well. It keeps the human in us still alive. It makes us thank God each and every day for what He has given us and for giving me the ability to do a little something, if not much, for such people.

Here’s a little something to hear from AIDS orphans themselves:

We had dropped out of school because we are orphans. We went for many days without food because we are orphans.

We were beaten and discriminated (against) because we are orphans. Relatives and neighbors grabbed the little that our parents left us just because we had no strength to fight back.

We lost hope and had no one to wipe our tears. It was made worse when some of us were named AIDS Children and neighbors even stopped their children from playing with us lest we infect them.

(Source: G.R.A.C.E.)

Here is a link I found if you wish to learn some of the issues regarding AIDS orphans.

This is a terrible disease that takes away the chance of a happy life for its victims. The only solution to this epidemic is precautions and spreading awareness. In countries like Pakistan and India, there is a serious need of awareness among people to save them and their families from being clawed by AIDS. It’s not about the person who is the victim of AIDS; it’s about his/her whole family. This disease leaves deeper scars on the family when the victim happens to be a parent. It’s totally absurd to say AIDS is solely the result of something immoral the person has done. By studying, you will very soon find out this is not so. There are other ways to get AIDS from an affected person, and in order to fight against AIDS. Know them, spread them, and do you duty to this world. Play your part. There are so many victims who die just because of the fact that they do not have money to get treatment. AIDS treatment is very expensive indeed, because it’s an ailment whose cure has not yet been found despite vast research and hard work by the best doctors in the world. Millions of people in Africa die just because of that. Children are the worst sufferers who often lose both of their parents once one of them is infected. When children get infected, many parents resort to discontinuing their education simply because they can’t afford both simultaneously. As the condition worsens and as the treatment charges increase, they don’t even get proper nutrition, hence medicine alone can’t help them more than it can with proper nutritious food. I am sad to see this face of Africa, because Africa is, to me, one of those places that have a lot to give to this planet. Look at the awesome wildlife, the beautiful landscapes, forests, deserts, water life, the fascinating culture and the very exotic black skin, so rich with traditions. Africa stands proudly at the map of the world because she knows she’s rich and deep and beautiful. Ah… the irony, Africa also has one of the poorest countries of the world.

If you are interested in reading more on Africa from Unicef, click here (pdf format).

A BBC cover story can be obtained here.

Help stop the discriminating behavior given to AIDS victims!! Play you part! They are humans with wishes, with feelings, with emotions! They were once like us, happy individuals with dreams of touching the moon in their own special way. We can never know the feeling of knowing all your dreams went down the drain because you’re gonna die soon… in a matter of months. They need us… they are weak… give them a reason to smile for the few days they have left to live. Please don’t ever let anyone treat them bad…!

I found an online service from UNICEF that enables us to select any country of our choice and generate report regarding the AIDS facts of the chosen country: Epidemiological Fact Sheets on HIV/AIDS and Sexually Transmitted Infections.

As with my post on the child labor cause, we can spread awareness by what we write. And yes, my very favorite: join online causes that are free of cost and/or online donations, whatever you choose.

Some sites I came acroos are:

A little stamp for your blogs if you wish to support this on your page as well :)

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picture courtesy: deviantART

other sources:

Child Sexual Abuse

2011-01-17T10:36:00.004+05:00

Every other day we get to hear a news something like a kid hardly of age 4 or 5 got raped. What we do is watch/hear the news, condemn the incident, abuse the monster, say a few words for the victim (who hardly survives) and move on. Kids at that age are too young to understand what actually is happening/happened with them nor are they strong enough to defend themselves. The only thing parents can do is protect them from anybody and everybody.

The question is what is sexual abuse? When an adult or an older adolescent uses a child in any way for sexual stimulation it comes in sexual abuse. This can happen in many ways. When an adult touches any of kid’s body parts it comes in sexual abuse. Indecent exposure of the genitals to the kid is a form of sexual abuse too. If an older person makes the kid watch any sort of pornography, that also comes in sexual abuse. Actual sexual contact against a child, physical contact with the child's genitals (except in certain non-sexual contexts such as a medical exam), viewing of the child's genitalia without physical contact (except in nonsexual contexts such as a medical exams), or using a child to produce child pornography, it all comes in sexual abuse.

Do not be shy when educating your kid. Sit with him. Tell him what is sexual abuse. Give him all the confidence. Don’t always teach him how to be well mannered around his elders. Educate him how to move away from a person who doesn't make him comfortable. A kid always gets to know when he is touched in a bad way but he wont necessarily talk about it. If he comes to you and tells you anybody does it, don’t just accuse him of making up stories. don’t ever say to a kid ’that’ particular person cant ever do it. This will make your child more confused. Listen to him and take him into confidence. If you stop him from telling it to you once, he will never come back to tell you again. If a child does that, the abuser will get worst and you never know what can the result be.

There are many misconceptions about sexual harassment. We think only girls are the victims of sexual harassment. It happens many times that little boys are the ones abused. Don’t just protect your girls, protect the boys too. Its not just that men are the abusers, women do it too. Never think that there is a particular person who cant ever do it, anybody and everybody can be a child molester. If you think any of your close family relative or old family domestic servant cant do it, you are badly mistaken. Never trust anybody when it comes to your own children.

Many parents these days just provide modern facilities to their kids. A mobile or unlimited internet can also result in sexual harassment. It happens that the kids are sexually abused virtually too. If you are too ‘cool’ and too desperate to give all these things to your child before time, educate him first. A very nice article by Rabab Khan about educating kids based on a very casual incident happened a few days is here. Read it yourself and make your kids read it too.

When a child is sexually molested, don’t just think he will get over it with time. Forgetting incidents like these is more than impossible. It leaves a lifetime mark on a child’s personality. It happens many times that a childhood sex abuse victim becomes a future abuser. No matter how close the abuser is to you, never justify him. Always explain it to the kid what happened to him was wrong, the child never deserved it. The insecurity that takes birth in the child after the incident never dies. If you yourself cant do it, get some professional help to bring back the child to normalcy. Time does not heal every wound, some need serious attention too.

You can not protect your child all the time. As he grows up he has to go to school, has to go out to play with kids, or at times has to go to the market etc. Children who are old enough to understand things should be made aware. If parents can discuss family politics and can make them a part of it, they should be comfortable enough to talk to their kids about how they can become a victim so easily. He should know what he can possibly face once he gets out of the house. Don’t just protect your kids physically, mentally and morally; educate them too.

YOU CAN FIND THE SIMILAR POST HERE

Our Children and Online Predators

2011-01-15T10:00:00.000+05:00

You know the times when a seemingly well-meaning online acquaintance suddenly starts to get too close for comfort? When someone you barely know on Twitter suddenly asks you if they can have your phone number? When you can a private message in your facebook inbox that says, “Hey! I liked your profile picture so I copied it, can I have some more?” and you go like “Whaa?!”

Well, then you most probably know what an online stalker and online predator is. Almost all of us, regardless of gender, have had similar experiences and many people I know have their own little set of warning signs that they use to detect such people. What about young children?

Now just how many of these under 17 year olds have lied about their age to surpass the “must be over 13” limit? We don’t know. The point is, most of these children, both male and female, are highly prone to online predators. While grownups have learnt to deal with the issue by using signs, warnings, specific behaviour etc to detect an online predator, many children have not. Children, even if they are 15 or 16 years old, sometimes do not have the experience or the knowledge to perceive and then protect themselves from these dangers.

Recently, I was alarmed by a small incident on my twitter timeline that compelled me to write this post. I received a random @mention tweet saying “Hello, nice dp” from someone I don’t know and do not follow. As usual, I checked out the person’s profile and boy was I shocked! He was apparently trying to entice a young girl into talking dirty! Over tweets! And, he wanted her to MMS him her pictures. All over tweets. The most shocking of them was this tweet: “Are you hot?” Thankfully, the child had refused to send him pictures, not without a cute giggle however. (Yes, you can do that on tweets). I was shocked, enraged and ready to annihilate the idiot. Eventually, I got the child to block him and report him for spam. My little twitter army of friends did the same.

(If all this twitter jargon is too much for you and you don’t know what I’m talking about, please Google it. Thank you.)

What is worth noting in all this is the fact that the child had no idea whatsoever how to deal with it. She was uncomfortable, as she said later on, and did not like the kind of things he was saying, but did not know what to do or say. In my mind, this is a failure on the part of the parents. I’m sure most parents would be horrified at the idea of sending a child out into a jungle, unarmed and unprotected, but how many times do we let them out into the world wide web similarly unarmed and unprotected? How do you let young immature children out into all those social networks with so many beasts ready to hunt them down without equipping them with any form of protection?

According to a study about media and its use that I saw here, children’s use of the various social networks has increased over the years. As parents, older siblings, uncles, aunts and teachers, we all have a responsibility to protect OUR children from these people. When was the last time you talked to your children about online risks? Did you tell them what they should do if they ever get an uncomfortable vibe from an older person? Does your child even know how to detect an uncomfortable vibe? Hmph! I’m not talking to all you parents anymore. You should have known what you were getting into before you started breeding like rabbits!

Alright kids, this is for you. Do you know that kind man or woman who seems to be all nice to you? Yes, the same one who asks you how many people live in your house and where you go to school. Please, block them. Here is a list of some signs you can watch out for to help you understand if someone is dangerous. (And all you lazy parents who buy your kids the latest gadget so your kid can always be connected, add your suggested signs in the comments please. Do something at least!)

1. Private Message: Hey! This new picture is awesome!

Kids, if you ever get a random message from someone you don’t know and who is definitely way older than you are, please ignore it. No matter what the network, twitter, Facebook, MySpace etc, this person means no good. (Do I sound like Ted Mosby yet?)

2. Friendly, caring and cool:

Now, kids, not all adults are perverts, but that doesn’t change the fact that there’s a large number of them out there. Sometimes, you find this one person on twitter or Facebook or whatever other social network you kids use nowadays and he/she seems like the perfect best friend. They will listen to all your stories, sympathize with you when your mom or dad don’t understand where “you’re coming from” and even send you a gift on your birthday. I bet they also listen to the same kind of music you do and like the same kind of food. And I bet they hate being told what to do too. Right?

This person, especially if it is a stranger and you only know them online, is someone you should be very careful about. Do not, ever, in your wildest dreams, agree to meet up with them. You may think it’s cute and sweet when they comment on your pictures on Facebook or send you little funny messages that make you feel like a grown up. Some people may even be genuinely nice, but you have to be careful. I would suggest you talk to your parents about someone like this. Yes, parents, no matter how irritating they can be sometimes, they really care and are most probably your best bet when it comes to getting rid of buggers.

Think about it, kids. Why on earth would an adult be interested in your little problems? Who cares if you broke up with so and so and your friend said this and did that? The only people who actually do care, even if they don’t have the time to tell you so or show it, are your parents. Seriously, these guys seem to have nothing else to do but care about you little people. Get a life, eh? Watch and learn, kids, watch and learn. (Uh oh, that sounded like Barney Stinson!)

3. Get Personal:

So, uh, how many sisters do you have?
What does your dad do?
What school do you go to?
Oh, I live in the same area, what apartment is yours?
Oh, that school? What time do you get off school?
Really?
“Hey this picture is really cute, how about you change into something comfortable and take another one?” (Yes, sadly, I have seen this one. From a forty year old to a child barely 13 years old. And it was sad. Very sad.)
Back from school?
What are you going to wear?
What are you wearing right now?

I could go on forever, well, ok not really. But you get the idea. Seemingly harmless questions like the above are really your pervert online friend’s way of getting some highly perverted pleasure. *shudder* While you think you are in control, it’s actually that person controlling you using his underhanded tactics. Now, you don’t like being manipulated and controlled do you?

4. Offers:

Gifts, pictures, online sleepovers (yeah, happens), exchange phone numbers and what not. Never click on links in chat messages or tweets or DM’s or private messages or… (God there are so many ways of getting to you guys!) Getting a virus into your computer is at the least dangerous end of things. You have no idea what that link might lead to. Maybe even a humungous man-eating giraffe with crazy Cookie Monster ideas. Brrr! Alright, may be not that, but you get the picture. People like this, usually try to lead you into watching porn and other eewy stuff with them so they can get you to meet them. Reminder: You don’t want to be controlled, do you? Be your own boss. You want to watch porn, well you shouldn’t, but if you do, do it alone without a weird smelly grownup online.

Do you really want to be free entertainment for a pervert who was most probably ditched by all his/her friends and now lives a lonely life in a garage or something?

What signs would you use to detect an online predator and what do you do to keep your child safe? I would love to hear about it.

Rabab Khan

The Silent Killer

2011-01-14T02:48:00.004+05:00

"I am gonna quit it, this is the last one!" and the so-called last one is never the LAST ONE!!

Whether you call it an addiction or a habit, the fact remains the same that smoking is a silent killer. Every year millions of people die around the world from this inveterate disease. It is beyond my understanding why can't people give up this habit, despite the growing awareness of its harmful consequences. The funniest thing is when the social smokers proudly say "Mine is not a habit. I smoke occasionally and am better than chain smokers". But according to the research, people who are occasional smokers share some of the same risks as chain smokers. In simple words, it doesn't make any difference if you consume poison slowly or swiftly, the reaction is going to be the same.

Another funny thing I find in every T.V commercials for cigarettes is just after the commercial ends there is a small note saying 'Smoking is injurious to your health, Ministry of Health - Government Warning'. I wonder if the government is so concerned about its citizens' health then why do they allow their channels to show such commercials? Why isn't there any ban on its consumption? Just showing a note on T.V or the 'No Smoking' signs and stickers in shopping malls and public places won't work. I myself have seen people smoking in non-smoking areas but there's nobody to stop them.

Lets have a look at some of the major diseases produced by smoking:

Mouth cancer
Lung cancer
Bladder cancer, Colorectal cancer
Coronary heart disease
Kidney cancer
Uterus cancer
pharynx cancer
Moreover, It increases the stress level.

and the list goes on. If only people would realize the value of their lives & how important are they to their loved ones!

I hope my message is very well conveyed to the concerned folks & I really hope that one day I'd see a better smoke-free environment in my country.

A complain is a gift

2011-01-12T22:39:00.000+05:00

Everyone in this world wants to hear praise, admiration and commendation but no one wants to listen complains. Someone complain a lot doesn’t mean they are unhappy. Obviously, there is some connection between what happens in some one's life and the things that they complain about. When a lot of bad events occur i.e. traffic jam, bad weather or load shedding people usually complain. In other words, complaining is a way to vomit out bad feelings it makes people feel better and light.

Complaining is not a bad thing a single complain can change one’s life. It turns into a gift for someone. Many people in the world learn from mistakes but there are a certain group of people including organization that learns from complains. Most of the organizations especially restaurants etc are relying on complains. The secret behind their success is that they listen and solve complains of their customers. But there are certain organizations that don’t believe in this theory. They have turned deaf ears on customer’s issues, off course our own K.E.S.C In our society there are two kinds of people who complain against injustice and other who remains quite because they don’t have guts to complain against illegal things. Complaining against in justice is equivalent to social work and people who are taking actions against it , they are giving a gift of peace to the world. Similarly if you complain about a kid to his parents then it will turn a gift for him in future.

In this age where media has changed human minds socially and psychologically. In this situation if you are complaining against bad stuff and because of you things are changing and turning into a gift. It means that you are still in your senses using your gray cells to think and act. You are not completely retarded, congrats!

www.noor-ul-ainhanif.blogspot.com

Tryst with Honesty

2011-01-11T21:48:00.002+05:00

I studied way back in school that Honesty is the best policy. Not only my teachers, but also my parents taught me the same thing again and again. I’m lucky to be brought up in an environment which always stood up with the saying. So, gradually I was convinced and started thinking on the same lines. I was also told that the path of honesty is not a bed full of roses. It’s not easy to follow and it needs a strong determination and will power.

Earlier, I thought why people don’t stick with the path of honesty. It’s the simplest path to follow; you don’t have to conjure a story. Just do what is right. Then, I myself met with an incident. This post is all about my tryst with honesty.

This happened with me in the last semester, somewhat in the middle of September. I was busy preparing for my first internal exams. I guess, Industrial Electronics was the second or the third paper. Trust me; I was full of goose bumps as the syllabus was wide and hard. But, the whole night of studying made me confident to face the exam.

I was happy after seeing the question paper. I knew almost all the answers. But then, God had reserved something for me in advance which was just waiting to be bombed. Hardly, 5 minutes after I got such joyous feelings I felt something vibrating in my jeans right side pocket. Oh my God, I was dead, Shit. Such feelings came in me when I finally made it what was vibrating. I was sitting in the examination hall with mobile in my pocket. Wasn’t it great…! OOppss… What to do now? It was bit strange on the part of the examiner that till now she wasn’t able to find out what was making the burr sound.

I was now left with two options, isn’t that was great… I was in the middle of a tragedy and still viewing the whole thing objectively. So, the first option was to sit around quietly, make no noise and continue doing the paper until I get caught. Second one was bit daring; It was to stand and tell the truth to the examiner. You guess it wrong, I choose the second one. Yeah, I know you can call it as suicide and me a fool.

Why I choose the second option? Simple, that was something I have been brought up by. I have never been taught to run from my mistakes. I did make a mistake of not checking my jeans pocket and bringing the mobile inside the examination hall. That was something against the rule book. Also, till then I have met teachers who rate honesty more than any other thing. Hardly 5 minutes had passed, so I thought examiner would understand my point, would be pleased by my honesty and would allow me to continue with my paper. But, nowadays teachers are not the same which they used to be few years back. Teaching has become a profession and people get into it for the sake of money not for inculcating principles in the mind and soul of students.

My mobile was snatched, I got it later on (easily), and I was shown the doors. Luckily, we have three internals in a semester out of which only two are considered. I lost the respect for the teacher, I happened to met her once; She said, “I lost faith in you”. I replied, “Something very similar happened with me, I didn’t lost faith in you, but in teachers in general”.

This incident got me puzzled and vexed up for days, I kept thinking whether honesty is of any use in this world. But, then how can I leave something which my parents taught me? I’m still following the path of honesty… Let’s see what’s waiting next?

Read more such tryst @ Weakest Link

Image Source: Google
Post inspiration: Madam NK( ECE branch)

It's never too late!

2011-01-09T01:37:00.001+05:00

Last week I came across a very interesting and inspirational forwarded email. In that email, there was a short story of a pencil and an eraser. Once the pencil was feeling sorry for the eraser that for every little mistake it makes, the eraser has to erase it & in doing so, it loses a part of itself. Thus, its life becomes shorter and shorter in order to obliterate pencil’s mistakes. Same is the case with our parents. They are with us in all the ups and downs of our lives, when there’s nobody to support our decisions, when we really need someone to take a stand for us. I’ve learned from my own experiences that at the end everyone you trust will turn their backs on you. Your friends, your relatives and even the one you love. But the only person who’ll be with you in the time of need is your mother and your father. We don’t really comprehend their contributions in our lives. We don’t realize what we’ve got until we lose them or until we have to stay away from them or until they’re gone. When we are young, we hate their interferences, we dislike their lectures, we loath their advices. But then, we miss those advices, those lectures when there’s nothing left in our hands. And trust me, only then we realize how true were them. Even I myself never bothered to ponder over what my father used to advice me when I was young. Today, when I am confronting with the realities and true face of life, now I realize how right was he. God has created our parents, so that they can teach us what they’ve learned from their lives and experiences. And I believe that each and everything they’ve taught us will help us some day in our lives. But alas! We think that we know better than them and that they’ve got to learn from us how to spend their lives ‘our way’ rather than learning from their experiences. And when we realize that whatever we did was wrong, it’s too late.

Our parents dedicate their whole lives for the sake of their children. They work hard and try to give us a luxurious life, they bless us with all the necessities of life and in the end we give them nothing but our ignorance and anger. So guys, let’s start doing something good for our dear parents. Lets make them feel special and tell them what they really mean to us. It’s time to pay back our parents for whatever they’ve done for us, becuase it's never too late!

What do we prepare ourselves for: Marriage or a Wedding??

2011-01-07T14:03:00.000+05:00

[Posted on behalf of Sara Khalil]

Pretty dresses, mehandi, jewelry, invitation cards, houses lit in and out and decorated with different kinds of followers. Yes! You guessed it right. The wedding season is on. We see many people getting happily married around us these days. The above mentioned things and more are apparently the most important components of a wedding.

It all starts with the selection of the perfect spouse. The society we live in, it’s mostly that the parents select the ‘better half’ for their kids. Even if a girl or a boy chooses himself/herself the perfect spouse, they still mostly have to go for their parents’ consent. The selection process is totally different for both genders. While selecting the perfect partner, parents and the kids themselves generally do not look at the personality or the character, but go for the evident material things.

Media or the occasional real life stories have made both the genders so bitter against each other and the in laws that they can hardly expect any good from each other. Guys always think, before or after the marriage that his in laws are against his family and him. He always has it in his mind that the bride and her family are conspiring against him in some way or the other. Most of the guys think women marry for money and will remain married till the guy has it. But the fact is most of the women in our society marry men with nothing, help them gain something and remain with them till they have everything.

It’s not just the guys that have this misconception about the girls or their families; it’s the girls too. The daily soaps are very much penetrating in our daily lives and are poisoning them in many ways. The girls before marriage at times have this in mind built in that her in laws are or will be against her. They don’t like her and will make every effort to separate her from her husband. If we think of it logically, why will they when they themselves selected her (in most cases) and made her their daughter in law? It’s quite understandable that it’s tougher for a girl to adjust in when compared to the guy, but thinking like that makes it tougher for her. If she takes her mother/father in law as her mother/father and sisters/ brothers in law as her own siblings, it’s her who will be the most comfortable in the situation. Helping in daily chores or doing all of it themselves is not that difficult. We see it many times that the girls do a lot more in their own houses but complain about doing it when living with their in laws.

We all mostly expect it from the girl that she should be the one compromising in all situations. If she has to take her in laws as her own family, she should be given the love and respect she deserves living in her own family. It is rationally impossible for anybody to accept strangers like that without them being kind to her. The guy’s family should accept the girl as their own family member. We mostly see a war like situation between the wife and the mother of men. I again call it a star plus effect. The mother should realize that she brought her son somebody who left everything for him should be given proper space. Same has to be understood by the girl, mother is the one who brought the guy up and they both can’t be should not be split apart. Many times its men to be blamed for it. They are the ones who lose the balance which causes a conflict.

The girl does not have to go and tell everything to her family. She should own the family she gets married in to. Their disrespect should be a disgrace for her too. It happens that the girls take every matter to her parents; unnecessary interference of the girls’ family in the issues causes many problems. Woman should be able to handle little issues themselves without asking their mothers for a suitable situation. But of course, if it really is unbearable for the girl to stay there, if she is treated badly or abused etc., she should never stay quiet about it.

Marriage is the most significant institution in a person’s life. It’s on the marriage’s base that the new relationships are built. Respect for everybody involved is the key point to its success. Accept everybody whole heartedly. Look beyond material things. Don’t just prepare yourself for the wedding, do it for the marriage. Wedding lasts for a day or two, marriage goes on for forever (in most cases). Why not make it a happy and content one?

Stop Human Trafficking!

2011-01-06T10:00:00.007+05:00

[Posted on behalf of Asma Khan]

Human Trafficking is a heinous crime against humanity and an international issue. Every country in the world is affected by trafficking. Indeed human trafficking has been institutionalized; you may say a lucrative industry.

Every year, thousands of men, women and children fall into the hands of traffickers, in their own countries and abroad. Human trafficking usually affects women and children. Human trafficking depends on the use of force, fraud, or compels to exploit a person for profit. It has a worst impact on individual victims. Trafficking is a crime that violates the fundamental human rights of its victims.

The purpose behind this crime is exploitation, which includes forced labour, slavery or similar practices, sexual exploitation, and the removal of organs (Organ trafficking: a fast-expanding black market).

According to United States State Department data, an "estimated 600,000 to 820,000 men, women, and children [are] trafficked across international borders each year, approximately 80% are women and girls and up to 50 percent are minors.

The United Nations estimates nearly 2.5 million people from 127 different countries are being trafficked around the world. [Human Trafficking Statistics Report Dec - 2010]

In Pakistan men, women, and children trafficked for the purposes of forced labour and sexual exploitation. The country’s largest human trafficking problem is that of bonded labour. Particularly in brick kilns, carpet-making, agriculture, fishing, mining, leather tanning, and production of glass bangles.

Here in Pakistan poverty is main problem. This forces trafficking of children on the rise. Desperately poor families go to a feudal employer usually a brick kiln owner or a carpet manufacturer and ask them for a loan. As they are very poor and needy so they never are eligible to pay back loan, then a time come the entire family is turned into the private property of the employer. Bonded labour otherwise known as debt slavery is rampant in Pakistan. Further, boys are trafficked from Pakistan to Gulf countries to serves as camel jockeys, sometimes families sold these victims into servitude, while in other cases they were kidnapped. October 8 earthquake proved a perfect business opportunity for the human traffickers. In present flood affected areas trafficking mafia has become active creatively.

There are opportunities for all of us to get involved and speak up against this human rights violation.

If we want to stop human trafficking, we need to ask ourselves, what are real problems that exist behind people circumstances those lead them being trapped by traffic mafia and more focus to be put on root causes. Then according to research we have to choose better steps for creating awareness and prevention of it.

We encourage local and national authorities to start programs for providing small loans and also financially beneficial projects and intervene to rescue victims and detain traffickers. We may highlight the issue of human trafficking into the public eye through the media. Electronic and print Medias are all used to warn and educate the public by providing general information on the subject. Effective way of eliminating human trafficking is by empowering people at risk, empowerment of people is possible through education, employment and provision of security.

We need to generate awareness among the public and to help prevent victims from falling prey to traffickers.

We may also help the victims of trafficking after their rescue by providing comprehensive psychological and social support, and helping them to mingle into society again.

Together, we can make a huge difference to combat slavery. Everyone can do something to stop human trafficking.

Watch Your Kids

2010-12-30T09:30:00.000+05:00

[Posted on behalf of Sara Khalili]

Parents, the ones who bring children to this world, grow them up; make them identify the fine line between right and wrong, fulfill their demands, keep a check on their needs and provide them what they want. They are the guardians of the little minds. They scold them where they go wrong and bestow their love when they are broken/injured in or out. No matter how old a person gets and what he starts thinking of himself, he can never out grow his parents. He may learn new things, earn more money, see more places than his parents ever did; he still remains a little kid for his parents.

Providing your children a strong roof does not mean you are protecting them. Making them wear woolen outfits in winters can protect them from the harsh weather but won’t save them from the cold behaviors of the world. First five years in a kid’s life are the most significant. The foundation of the child’s personality gets developed then. Mother and father, both should try being present for him in these years.

Charity begins at home; so does guiding or educating your kids. I see a lot of teachers around me, whose children are not taught at home. The children are proudly sent to the tutors. Offspring of the religious people are at times ill mannered. They don’t seem to tell any of the good things to their children what they keep preaching to the world. No offense, you should orate all those things to your own kids first what you keep doing to others.

You never know how your children are treated when they step out of the house. Once the kid enters the house from school, parents are supposed to ask how his day was. How did his teacher treat him? How do his age fellows or older kids treat him? Is he enjoying his days at school or not? Ask him if he is happy or upset. And if your child tells you, a teacher treats him badly or he is being bullied at school or he doesn’t like the school; listen to him. There always is a reason behind your kid being upset. Don’t just ask him straight away; ‘what did YOU do?’ Happens a lot of times that your child is innocent, he gets treated badly in school. Many a times even the child doesn’t understand what the problem is. Talk to him, figure out his problems.

Leaving kids with nannies is in fashion these days. When they grow up they are sent to the tutors or the molvis (Quran teachers). Parents go out partying and leave their kids with housemaids. This really spoils a kid. You never know how an outsider treats your child. We have seen many cases where children get sexually harassed by housemaids. Never trust anybody when it comes to your own children. If you have to send them to the tutors or molvis, keep an eye on them. Don’t leave your child with a stranger. If we think odd behaviors or sexual harassment is inconsequential, we are wrong. They leave a dark spot on the little one’s personality; which never can be washed away.

Change your attitude towards your kids as they grow up. Don’t treat a teenager like a baby or a grown up as a teenager. Your being caring towards them is understandable. As they mature, their way of thinking and living gets different too. Cope up with their changing behaviors if you want to bridge the gap between you and your young ones. Once you nurture them their way, they will grow up to be your way. And I don’t mean you let them do, good or bad, what they do. Tell them what is bad for them and will harm them. Sit with them, talk to them. Give them time. Help them make their choices. Don’t impose your decisions on them.

Being parents a great deal of responsibility falls on your shoulders. Most of us think responsibilities include; putting kids in a good school, feeding them the high quality food full of all vitamins and minerals, getting them the best toys in the market, taking them to the park or malls, giving them all the modern facilities in the world etc. Mother and father; two people who are the most influential ingredients of a person’s life. It is in your hands how you grow your kids up. You never know what your child can do, help him make a difference.

Wide Your Vision!

2010-12-25T12:32:00.000+05:00

[A Guest Post By Asma Khan]

If we build walls around us then we will never feel the pain of others. Our sympathy shall be limitd only to us, and we will always feel downtrodden and also all time feel pity for ourself. Do not be self-centered like greedy selfish being. Wide your vision, come to the position of other people (those are helpless and needy) wear their shoes and now see the world, it'll surely seem to you totally diffrent.

When differences speak the same Truth...

2010-12-12T23:17:00.001+05:00

Here is a compilation of 22 excerpts about non-violence, Peace & Unity found in sacred texts of different religions, International collective agreements towards Harmony and quotes from famous spiritual leaders who made their Lives signatures for Acceptance, Compassion and Peace.

Of course these are only parts of many more words and works written to invite Humanity to gather around its most beautiful Truth. Oneness.

Follow the Trail and maybe, like me, you will realize that there is a Truth beyond all truths. A Truth that makes us undeniably connected. Humanity's freedom comes from its capacity to choose what to look at and look for. Let's choose a Truth that makes us ultimately inseparable. This Truth is Love.

#1 "Love thy neighbor as thyself". Mark 12:31 Bible

#2 Pursue Peace Before Waging War. Preserve the Ecological Needs of the Environment. Maintain Sensitivity to Human Life. The Goal is Peace. ~ Torah

#3 Non-Violence means avoiding not only external physical violence but also internal violence of spirit. You not only refuse to shoot a man, but you refuse to hate him. ~ Martin LutherKing, Jr.

#4 Peace is one of God’s names (59:23) Qu'ran

#5 Whoever killed a human being should be looked upon as though he had killed all mankind (5:32) Qu'ran

#6 Ahimsa is not causing pain to any living being at any time through the actions of one's mind, speech or body.--Sandilya Upanishad

#7 Let your aims be common, and your hearts be of one accord, and all of you be of one mind, so you may live well together.--Rig Veda X . 191

#8 "God, in thy name bless the Whole Humanity" ~End of Sikh Prayer

#9 Everyone is equal. All people of different colour, religion, caste, creed, race and sex are equal in the eyes of God. No one is high or low. All are children of God created by God and God loves them all.” ~ Sikhism

#10 "... May I always be mindful of the diversity of Nature as well as its Unity. May I always be tolerant of those whose race, appearance, culture and ways differ from my own. [...] May I act out of love for other beings on this planet -- to other human, plants, animals, minerals, elementals, spirits or other entities. ~ Pagan pledge

#11 I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is only temporary; the evil it does is permanent.’ Gandhi

#12 Respect yourself and others will respect you. ~ Confucius

#13 A weapon, howsoever powerful it may be, can always be superseded by a superior one; but no weapon can, however, be superior to non-violence and love. ~ Jainism prayer

#14 Give us the wisdom to teach our children to love, to respect, and to be kind to each other, so that they may grow with peace in mind. Let us learn to share all good things that you provide for us on this Earth. Native American Prayer

#15 "We must draw lessons from the experiences we gained. If we look back at the last century, the most devastating cause of human suffering has been the culture of violence in resolving differences and conflicts. The challenge before us, therefore, is to make this new 21st century a century of dialogue when conflicts are resolved non-violently. In human societies there will always be differences of opinions and interest. However, the reality today is that we are all inter-dependent and have to co-exist with one another on this small planet. As a result, the only sensible and intelligent way to resolving differences and clash of interests today, whether between individuals, communities or nations, is through dialogue in the spirit of compromise and reconciliation. We need to research, develop and teach this spirit of non-violence and invest in these efforts as much resources as we do for military defense."~ The Dalai Lama

#16 Christian, Jew, Muslim, shaman, Zoroastrian, stone, ground, mountain, river, each has a secret way of being with the mystery, unique and not to be judged. ~ Rumi (Sufism)

#17 "Be good, be kind, be humane, and charitable; love your fellows; console the afflicted; pardon those who have done you wrong." ~ Zoroaster

#18 "All my actions have their rise in my alienable love of mankind. I have known no distinction between relatives and strangers, countrymen and foreigners, white and coloured, Hindus and Indians of other faiths whether Muslims, Parsees, Christians or Jews...All men are brothers and no human being should be stranger to another. The welfare of all...should be our aim. ~ Gandhi

#19 If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~Mother Teresa

#20 The Holy Prophet Muhammad came into this world and taught us: 'That man is a Muslim who never hurts anyone by word or deed, but who works for the benefit and happiness of God's creatures. Belief in God is to love one's fellow men.' ~Abdul Ghaffar Khan

#21 We, the peoples of the United Nations, determined to save succeeding generations from the scourge of war, which twice in our lifetime has brought untold sorrow to mankind, and to reaffirm faith in fundamental human rights, in the dignity and worth of the human person, in the equal right of men and women and of nations large and small....And for these ends to practice tolerance and live together in peace with one another as good neighbors...have resolved to combine our efforts to accomplish these aims. ~Preamble, Charter of the United Nations.

#22 We declare:
We are interdependent. Each of us depends on the well-being of the whole, and so we have
respect for the community of living beings, for people, animals, and plants, and for the preservation of Earth, the air, water and soil. Declaration Toward a Global Ethic

Marital rape – a complete betrayal

2010-12-09T12:38:00.000+05:00

[Posting on behalf of Jehan Ara - President: Pakistan Software Houses Association for IT & ITESA | This post is part of on going campign of 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-based Violence (25 Nov - 10 Dec)]

When people think of rape, they usually visualize a stranger violating a woman (or a man or a child) but very often the perpetrator is not a stranger. Sometimes it is someone the rape victim/survivor knows; some relative, a servant, someone they are dating, someone they are working with or going to school with. In any of these cases, it is a brutal violation of a human being and is a serious offence.

However, the violation that gets sidelined and is very often not even considered rape at all is marital rape. It appears that the man considers it his right to violate a woman any time he wants as if he owns her – he feels he has the license to, and more often than not, so does society.

Marital rape cuts a woman to the core and, as Rabeea Arif points out in this poster, “When it is the person you have entrusted your life to who rapes you, it isn’t just physical or sexual assault, it is a betrayal of the very core of your marriage, of your person, of your trust."

Be a part of 'Take Back The Tech' campaign and play your role in ending 'Violence Against Women', map it in your blog & webpage;

Stop Violence Against Women in Pakistan

2010-12-08T09:00:00.019+05:00

Violence against women is such a issue that is still occurring in this modern era. No doubt we call ourselves so called modernized people but still women are not allowed to discuss what is happening with them behind closed bars due to fear, ignorance and many religious factors. Still they are being beaten, killed,abused and are exposed to many severe forms of violence by their husbands, relatives, strangers, colleagues and many others.

I would suggest that Psychological interventions should arranged for the victims of violence.

In Pakistan, like in many other South Asian countries, honor is a virtue that is not only valued but demanded from society, especially from women. Women who "dishonor" their families face severe consequences at the hands of a strongly patriarchal society who continues to see women secondary to men.

Women who are seen as dishonoring their families are often the targets of these attacks.

Walking in public with a man who is unrelated to you could elicit an attack for it is often presumed that the woman is committing adultery. Fleeing an arranged marriage or a relationship where a woman is unhappy or being abused is another common reason for the attacks.According to the report, from April to June of this year more than 220 women reported being burned, 40 of whom died as a result of their injuries which can be extensive. When acid is thrown in a person's face, skin tissue melts on contact exposing the bone below the flesh that may also dissolve from the acid. If acid reaches the eyes, they are permanently damaged often leaving survivors with the use of only one or no eyes.

What's worse? According to the report women are not being given appropriate medical care and few seek legal action after being attacked. Many cases are also not even reported to police so the actual numbers of victims are far worse than we think.

Violence against women exists everywhere. We know this. I also know that I can no longer sit idly as governments around the world fail to protect these victims.

Alarming increase ’Dozens of women are burnt by acid every year in Pakistan, a form of violence that is on the rise.

Last year a report by the Human Rights Commission of Pakistan said: "Particularly alarming was the soaring rate of cases of mutilation by the pouring of acid over women, in a crime that acted to scar them permanently, both physically and emotionally."

There were 46 cases of acid attacks on women reported in Pakistan’s largest province, Punjab, in 2002. Violence against women is common among the poor and uneducated, many of whom live in feudal societies. Although acid attacks only account for a fraction of the overall incidents of violence against women, they are probably the most monstrous.

Acid mutilates and maims the victim, condemning her to lifelong isolation and emotional anguish.

Worse than death’ The rise in cases of acid burns is mainly because it is easy to get. A bottle for domestic use can be bought for just 20 rupees, less than half a US dollar. And the attack has devastating long-term consequences

No improvement’ Pakistan’s current parliament has an unprecedented number of women legislators but no one can raise voice against dis violence ...even a common person have no strength to stand up and take any action about dis ...So far, there is little evidence of a decline in the rate of acid attacks on women. Due to inefficiencies in the police system, perpetrators are often able to escape, which encourages others to carry out acts of violence using acid. Across the country, hundreds of victims of such attacks still nurse their scars – both physical and mental.

Please stop this crime stop burning humanity

Dedicated to all womenTime has come now

To stand for that we need

Not equality, but priority.

Upright

We want to open our heart

Express our mind

For that we need

Not equality, but priority.

Fathers can be cruel even

Mothers cannot.

Mothers can sacrifice

Fathers cannot.

That is what women are

We can do everything.

Combating with sorrow

Win happiness.

No more shall we endure injustice

No more shall we remain within the four walls.

Time has come to open ears and eyes

To protest against unfair deeds.

For that we need

Not equality, but priority.

Nurture our Children

2010-12-05T14:05:00.000+05:00

There are many little children in India, who are spending their valuable childhood in fields, jungles, factories, homes and stores, to earn a living for themselves and their family. Their innocent childhood is clouded with the worries that haunt them day and night till they faint with fatigue. And this is not the story of a single day. It is a grueling reality which traps him in a vicious circle, leaving no way out. No matter what dreams his little mind dares to see, his family - that generally is in no way confined to a small number, forces him to bear the onus of the family. His little shoulders stoop under the burden thrusted upon him in such a small age.

That is the story of the ‘poor’ child (pun intended). This child represents every other child who is unfortunately born to a family that is below the Poverty Line. This makes matters worse if the child is a girl. In fact, some people consider the birth of a girl child as a burden & in many cases, murders or abandonment of the girl child have been reported.

Although in this age of computers & nanotechnology, it seems a fable, yet, this glaring reality is staring at our faces today. There was a gory incident in A.P. that happened seven years back, and still remains in my memory till date. This incident found great coverage in all the news media. It was about a cruel ritual followed by tribal people in a remote village, according to which, 105 children are buried alive for one minute every year in order to please their local Gods. The incident was reported in the news for some days, but nothing apart from that was done. Although the government passed a law against such gory rituals, there are many such incidents that go unreported. No one protests, no one comes forward to do something about it. Human sacrifices are still happening. But who is to care? No body.

Many similar incidents have been reported during the last couple of years, which tear at our hearts. A case in example is again the notorious Nithari Kand as the news channels like to put it, where in, human skeletons were found in a house, subsequent investigations of which led to the arrest of the house owner who confessed to having committed many more heinous crimes than the one in question.

Another important issue rising today is that of human trafficking which consists of a major percentage of children, mostly girls. From many parts of the country, girls have been reported missing. These girls most of the time, end up in another state/country, where they are put up for crimes such as forced/handicapped begging & prostitution. Many bar girls have such stories to tell, but no body to hear them out. News Channels bring out such issues for filing out their prime time schedules during the weekends, but nothing concrete is done to help them. In fact, such issues need addressing right at the top form, from the state level ministers and the so-called Parliamentarians.

“Today’s child is tomorrow’s citizen”, how much are we striving to make the child a healthy, responsible citizen of our country? No body cares to turn and see the little child in rags lying on one side of the footpath, writhing in hunger and giving soulless stares to the passersby. If that is the picture of the future citizen, it’s certainly not something to be proud of in any way. What is to be done to alter this image of the future Indian?

We need our youth to become more sensible towards issues like these, issues that can only be revolutionized by the young mind. Although the order of the day seems to be , “Live and Let Live”, and although selfishness seems to have clouded the minds of people, by completely blocking them from realities such as these; yet, there is always Hope in the heart of every single youth who seems to understand the pathetic plight of the child laborers. However, the number of such empathizing youth is quite less, because such ‘seers’ are either ridiculed or left to handle the situation alone.

One twig can be broken easily, but a group of twigs cannot. So also, combined effort towards the upliftment of poor children will make an iota of difference that can prove a lifesaver to someone, although it may not seem much of a burden to the aides.

Moreover, the youth of today hold the key to the solution of the nation’s corruption and backwardness, yes, I use backwardness, because, there is only selective development in our country - selective development that is seen only in the metros & other larger cities. As for the towns and rural areas, there can only be hope, since these are the places where superstitions, orthodox values and age-old rituals still prevail to a greater or a lesser extent. But the point is that they DO prevail and hence, become the road-blocks in the development of the country’s children & in turn, the country itself. “A chain is only as strong as its weakest link”, hence I use the word backwardness; the day progress enters the rural-most areas in the country, we will be called “strong” and “developed” in the true sense of the word.

The role of government in addressing this issue needs to be evaluated in terms of the results. There is a need for tangible results, successful cases of children freed from captivity, child labour bondages, trafficking victims & prostitution racket bust-ups. The role of a government doesn’t end at freeing the children. It must take stock of their lives, keep a track of their livelihood, pay for their primary education & arrange for vocational courses to be taught to them.

This situation demands the collective effort of the youth, the media, the government & the NGO’s if any proper results have to be attained. When everybody works in tandem, things will fall into place. Who knows, the child we save today, could become a doctor & save the lives of hundreds of people during his lifetime!!

humanity

2010-12-04T19:46:00.001+05:00

A wise old Indian women saying...

Chage the way you think..

It will change the way you feel..

Which will change the way you act out..

Essentially.. if you don't like your environment.. change how you feel about it..

If you don't like your job.. either change the way you perceive it.. or find another one..

All things happen for a reason and ppl perpetuate negativity even for a reason..

There are always opposites.... with no opposing force.. how could we, as humans in all our great curiosity.. ever enjoy the grace of Light with no darkness.. Or joy with no sadness.. Or the wonderous green plants and the totally beautiful landscapes.. if there were no landfills.. no negativity to the environment...

We, as humans.. compare everything.. We live in a comparisson world..

We do not appreciate anything until .. either we loose it, it is threatended to be taken away from us... or we have something negative to compare it to...

Lets hold their hands(world disable day)

2010-12-03T18:25:00.000+05:00

The world is moving towards progress in every walk of life. But when we look towards societies, it feels as if some thing is still missing. Money, power, lust, etc., is the wish of every human being to attain. But we can't deny this fact that we all are bounded with loads of social problems, which are hard nuts to crack. The key element of success and self- satisfaction is missing in most of the societies. Social issues are matters which directly or indirectly affect many or all members of a society and are considered to be problems, controversies related to moral values, or both. Social issues include poverty, violence, pollution, injustice, illiteracy, corruption, bribery, suppression of human rights, discrimination, and crime, child abuse, rape, dowry system, abortion, sex, etc.
Out of many social problems, I feel that the rights of Exceptional people are always being neglected by every one. No one wants to hear them. No body wants to give them proper love and care. They are being rejected from most of the societies. Due to the ill- behavior of the people, they are facing lots of trouble to explore their talents and creativity. Now, the time has arrived, when we need to re-think about our attitudes towards them. Tall talks from the government officials that special needs people will be given opportunities were held back by the previous government and still they are weeping for their rights to be given.
I guess, no one has right to define any human in their own perception, until and unless, he/she knows himself/herself deeply and perfectly. But it is a matter of despairty in Pakistan, that Exceptional Children are considered as a different being. People are trying to give their own definitions about them without knowing the proper definition of human. Human are acting like an animal and showing lack of concern towards them.
Let us try to understand, who exceptional people are?
Those persons who have IQ score which differ from the mean by two or more standard deviations are called Exceptional persons. Mentally retarded are declared as those persons who have scores two or more standard deviations below the mean. While the persons having score two or more standard deviations above the mean are called gifted persons.
Categories in respect of IQ are as follows:
o 70 above Border Line (trained and understandable)
o 70-50 Mild (educable)
o 50-35 Moderate (trainable)
o 35-20 Severe (miniman skills)
o 20-0 Profound (custodial care)
Thus we can say that,
"Exceptional children are those, who lacks either motor, cognitive, language, social and emotional, or self-help skill development."
Imagine yourself sitting in Japan with the Japanese students communicating only in Japanese. How will you feel? At that moment, you will be called as a disable person who can't speak or understand their language. But this is considered by you as a normal reaction, because you know you are normal. If that is the case, then how could most of us declare other mental without judging their talents and special skills, which God has bestowed them.
What disability is all about?
"Disability" means the lack of ability to perform an activity in a manner that is considered to be normal."
"A disability is the expression of a physical or mental limitation in a social context- the gap between a person's capabilities and the demands of the environment."
(Pope and Tarlov, 1991 )
A person with disabilities means who, on account of injury, disease, or congenital deformity, is handicapped in undertaking any gainful profession or employment, and includes persons who are visually impaired as well. In short, Exceptional people are those, who either lacks one of the areas of development.
"Disability refers to the impact of impairment upon the performances or activities commonly accepted as the basic elements of every day living. Disability can be used when an impairment, objectively defined, constitutes a hindrance to mobility, domestic routines or the occupational and might be communicational skills."
According to the social model,
"Disability is the outcome of the interaction of person and their environment and thus is neither person nor environment specific".
Remember that physically disabled, blind/partially sighted, hearing impaired, autism, speech impairment, learning disabled, mild, moderate, severe, profound, borderline, etc., are some of the main categories of the Exceptional people out of many others. Persons with Exceptionality are mostly unseen, unheard and uncounted persons in Pakistan. They are the most marginalized group. Persons with special needs face overwhelming barriers in education, skills development and daily life.
The United Nations estimates that some 600 million people worldwide have a disability and that the vast majority of Exceptional people live in low and middle income countries. The proportion of Exceptional people in Pakistan as per census 1998 is 2.49 percent of total population, which is quite diverse from the estimates of World Bank, UN and WHO.
These children have equal right to freedom of expression, quality education and have access to a safe and healthy environment; in accordance with the Constitution of the Islamic Republic of Pakistan, 1973; to have full rights and obligations as citizens as confirmed in; the UN Declaration of Human Rights, 1948, on Education for All (1990), UN Standard Rules on Equalization of Opportunities of Persons with Exceptionality (1993), Salamnca Statement and Framework for Actions (1994), Dakar Framework for Action (2000), UN Millennium Development Goals (2001) and the National Policy for Persons With Disabilities (2002) guarantee the rights of all children, both with and without disabilities, to obtain quality education adapted to their individuals needs, abilities and aspirations and full equal participation in all other aspects of life such as participating in decisions and casting votes, etc.
But these claims proved to be false, when disable people raised their voice through media that how brutally they are being treated in Pakistani society.
Example: to attain quality education is the right for every disable, but still, no schools, colleges and universities have been setup by the government to cater their needs. Thanks to the private NGOs, who took an initiative and established few schools for the students with special needs.
The issue of Exceptionality is gaining more and more importance all over the world as well as in Pakistan. Due the movement for a rights based society initiated by many national organizations, World Bank and other donor agencies have included this issue in their mandates. Governments haves framed various policies including reservation jobs, concession facilities in traveling, special training institutions etc. But the question is, if these mandates were made, when it will be implemented, and who will implement it? No concession is being granted to any disable in Pakistan so far in any of the commodity, nor there is an institute, where they could learn skills free of cost. NGOs have set up institutions, which takes loads of money from the parents to support their child.
It has ratified several international conventions, promulgated the National Policy in 2002, begun revising the ordinance on employment which would raise the employment quota to two percent to ensure more job opportunities, and initiatives to develop "Inclusive Education". But so far, no initiatives have been taken by any of the government.
An infrastructure for Inclusive Education and Training was established in Pakistan in the 1980s which far exceeds that of most of the developing countries. However, despite these efforts, the sad fact is that most people with disabilities and their families remain completely un-served by government - and even NGO resources. There is dire need of more accurate data and research on causes, prevention, and curative efforts to understand the social and economic realities and possibilities with regards to disability.
The major barrier to employment and other socio economic benefits for persons with Exceptionality in our society continues to be attitudinal barriers; stereotypical thinking and assumption about what people with disabilities can and can't do. The truth is that, the range of abilities of persons within any Exceptional group is enormous. We need to get rid of our stereotypical images and view each "individual" as just that "an individual".
Only limited categories of disabilities (physical disabilities such as amputations, foot and leg deformities, visual and hearing impairments) have been surveyed nationwide and most of the data has not been categorized by gender. Therefore, quantitative, nationwide, disaggregated data, by gender and age, is required for comprehensive policymaking and an assessment of progress. In Pakistan, there is only the ministry, responsible for social welfare and special education, which touch upon person with Exceptional issues. Moreover, Pakistani's believe that persons with Exceptionality are a social burden and a curse on the family. These beliefs lead to the misunderstanding of disability. They prevent people from obtaining appropriate information and being educated. Employment opportunities for them are very limited and so they are a financial burden for their families.
Like us, Exceptional people are also bounded with some common problems, which they face in their day to day life.
Some of the problems of exceptional people are
o Hyperactivity;
o Distractibility;
o Impulsivity;
o Anxiety withdrawal;
o Fear and Phobias;
o Eating disorders;
o Echholahia;
o Movement problems;
o Depression;
o Suicidal Behavior;
o Difficult Temperament;
o Conduct Disorder;
o Aggression;
o Obsessions and Compulsions;
o Reluctant Speech;
o Elimination Disorder;
o Unresponsiveness to Suicidal Stimuli;
o Self Injury, etc.
Persons with disabilities face multiple social, economic, physical and political problems, which hampers their freedom of movement in society. These barriers include stigmatization and a misunderstanding of the abilities and aspirations of persons with disabilities. There is also a pronounced lack of informational data, rules and regulations, rehabilitation centers, and main streaming and specialized services for persons with Exceptionalities.
The major community problem for which I have contributed my efforts is for "THE RIGHTS OF SPECIAL PEOPLE". I have worked as a teacher/counselor/trainer of Exceptional People for 7 years. Since my childhood, I had an intention to social work for the Exceptional people, because I had a natural bond of attachment with them.
I believe that every individual can make a difference. I thank God that these lovely students trusted me, gave me the bond of relationship and accepted me whole-heartedly during my first year of Volunteer Service. They shared all of their problems with me and I thank God for giving me the special power for being accepted by them. I have heard their voices, their shivered pleadings, their wishes, their expectations. But still, they need every one in the society to hear them, to care them and to love them. While working for their RIGHTS, I also faced many difficulties in our society.
I can't do every thing alone, but at least, I have brought a little change in their lives, which is a big reward for me. The problems, which need to be resolved wholly, could only be possible, if the societies will join their hands together.

o Media should take an initiative to discuss their issues to create awareness among the masses
o Inclusive education should be made compulsory in every school as the part of their curriculum.
o Awareness campaign for students' parents' teachers' should be raised in every community.
o Job opportunities must be provided to disable people
o Their needs should be addressed.
o Awareness should be made through telecasting movies and drama on their issues.
o They should not be called special.
o Competition should be raised in every community for younger students to make them aware about their rights.
o They must get rights to study in normal schools with special needs.
o Government should setup new curriculum for them.
o Psychological testing should be made compulsory to identify their needs and areas of development.
o They must get work place opportunity, which is lack in Pakistan. They must get jobs in government institutions also.
Every one can contribute in the society:
o By participating in International competitions to raise awareness.
o By participating in awareness campaigns.
o By developing new curriculum for them on national policy level.
o By providing them educational facilities and social justice.
o By raising funds for them and by finding more work place opportunities for them.
o By becoming the Ambassador for Exceptional People in Pakistan.
o By truly implementing the human right laws, made by UN.
o By motivating them more enthusiastically.

BEST REGARDS:
Ayesha chaudhary

THE 10 MUST HAVES FOR PEACE OF MIND

2010-11-30T19:05:00.001+05:00

Ellen ( ellen-inretrospect ) had written in her post - THE 10 MUST HAVES INSIDE MY TOTE BAG – that we can list out same for many other aspects, like home, kitchen, travel and relationship etc. I while commenting had said that I am looking forward to her next post concerning relationship and I am also motivated to write one such post. So here I go on

THE 10 MUST HAVES FOR PEACE OF MIND

1. Be Honest To Yourself :

This in my opinion is the topmost. We can paint our wrongs as rights to others by advancing reasons in a manner making them believe those. But in heart of hearts we know we are wrong. So if we are honest to ourselves, we will be guided by our conscience to avoid doing anything wrong which would make us feel scared what if it is found out affecting our peace of mind.

2. Be Content With What You Have :

This does not mean that have no dreams or ambitions. Make all efforts to achieve what you desire for but be content with what you get. Continue striving without getting saddened if the results are less than expected.

3. Have No Jealousy :

X has a huge mansion inspite of being a dud while I live in a flat inspite of being so intelligent or Y has so many men as friends while I am more beautiful and intelligent but have hardly any, so you start feeling jealous of those persons. So analyse it , may be your financial management needs improvement or you are too snooty and make changes accordingly. Do think it over, does being jealous change anything? So let it be. Each to his or her own. Make efforts to achieve what they have.

4. Be Truthful :

Be truthful in your dealings, promises, relationships and profession. If you lie, it does make you feel insecure that it may be found out. I know it is easier said than done but in tricky situations one may find way out with diplomacy than telling a lie.

5. Have No Ego :

Be proud but not vain. If we feel we are superior to others, it will make us long for attention and if we do not get it or someone else gets it instead of us, this will lead to heartburn thus no peace of mind.

6. Have Open Mind :

Be prepared to listen to other person’s logic or reasons instead of being adamant the it is only “I” who is right. Accept your weaknesses or failures or mistakes.

7. Do Not Keep Grudges :

If someone has hurt or harmed us, talk it out but forget after that. Do be careful of that person in future but if we keep the hurt or harm fresh in our memory, it will lead to our mind being disturbed and longing for revenge all the time.

8. Communicate Honestly :

When you hide some facts while communicating to others, be it at work place or family affairs or friends or personal details, it will always lurk in your mind what if the hidden issues or details are found out.

9. Be Faithful :

Be faithful to your ownself, family, country, orgainsation, friends and last but not the least spouse. Do I need to elaborate on this?

10. Have Faith :

Have faith in yourself, family and fellow beings. Do be careful against betrayals but do not mistrust everyone as a rule. And have faith in God you believe in. Remember if good times have passed so will the bad times too.

I am sure there will be a lot of more for additions or changes in your mind, I welcome you all to share it with us here.

love him or leave him, but…

2010-11-30T15:50:00.000+05:00

[Posting on behalf of Divaa Divine - A guest post for on going campaign of 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-based Violence (25 Nov - 10 Dec)]

… never feel like you need him.

Dear Auntie,
I have been married for 14 years. My husband has been cheating on me for the past seven years. He has several cellular sims.

Sometimes my husband admits and promises not to do it in the future and sometimes he says I’m very possessive about him. We have three kids and they know about this issue. I’ve no one to talk to and I can’t discuss with my family. I’m trying hard to save my marriage but Auntie I’m really disturbed. My husband says this is only for fun and that he loves me too much and that he is 100% sincere with me. He has provided me with everything. But he is not faithful to me while I cannot even think about being unfaithful to him. It’s very hard to spend my life with an unfaithful partner, but I’m 100% committed to my husband.

Losing Faith

I caught the above excerpt from the weekend magazine which has a column dedicated for some serious help from an Aunt who calls herself Auntie Agni. I admire this aunty for the patience and perseverance she has when it comes to advising on some of the most impossible problems and cramps in peoples’ lives. The above letter was sent to her by a very faithful woman who for the past seven years [minusing the first seven where the husband was faithful] has put up with the infidelity of her husband. This post by no means is a sympathy or a mock for the poor woman. Especially when I too am part of a society where women are suppose to live all through with a man who is not worth a dime. Why?

Because the society says so.

It pains me to see such women, who have absolutely no fault and I angers me to see those women who know that they are clinging on someone else’s man [I am sure some people who trace my posts and hate me are sure to pinpoint my relationship with a man who was once my best friend, and I kept that relationship even after he was married, I will get back to you haters after I deal with this mess, in another post] and yet very proudly they hang onto him for their longings and desires which their husbands might not be fulfilling. As sour as this sounds, but the woman who lets herself be tortured and believes in all the things a man tells her, needs to wake up and smell the frost perhaps. She is giving herself away only because some rotten has ruled her so. Impossible and unbelievable. I have seen and known women who have walked out on their husband even after four kids and twenty years of marriage. I have even known a woman who walked out on her man when she caught him cheating once and that too after thirty years of their togetherness. This is the woman who seeks no pity, this is the woman who knows that God is with her and He will see to it that she makes it through. But a woman who wants to cling onto a situation which has no solution, I am sorry but your faith is just too putrid.

Put yourself in his shoes is what I would have advised this woman. She says she can’t even think about being unfaithful to him. Think it this way lady, if you were him and you caught your wife cheating on you, just once, how would you have taken it? Forgiven and forgotten? I don’t think so.

You should watch this really close to life movie titled ‘Life in a metro’… I salute the director to bring onto stage the exact reactions of human kind. There is a married couple, Kay Kay Menon and Shilpa Shetty. They have been married for good number of years, have a kid too. Now the husband after years of his marriage is cheating on his wife and the wife doesn’t have a clue, until one day she too slips for somebody she meets. Well she feels really bad about it and hence confesses it the moment the husband has to confess [because the wife's sister knows about his cheating], but as the wife does the confessing first, he totally loses his mind, and starts yelling at her and eventually walks out on her. So you see, he knows that the woman can’t leave him and hence his confessing would mean that the wife forgives him, but why should she? Is she any less human than he is?

Back to this woman who thinks her husband is god, WAKE UP! I cannot sympathize with you until you don’t. you have to pity your life which is blessed and you are making it so unblessed just by putting up with such misery. Your husband expects you to forgive him because he has a birth right to screw around, but put yourself in his position and think like I have asked you to. Sigh! I don’t know why I am getting so agitated. It sure is her life and she has the right to forgive and not forgive but I can at least guide. Auntie Agni did not tell her this shoe trick. I can’t tell her either, I don’t know her.

But this post is for all those unfortunate women who are so committed and so lost in the nutshell of their husband’s chikni chubri baatain, get out of it. If you want to get screwed, that is totally your call, but then don’t go running around for an advice which you will never take.

Signing off with a note of hope…
I wish things work out for the positive in this woman’s life. I really feel sorry for the situation she is in. Bless her Allah. Bless her!

Adopt a Life

2010-11-26T14:48:00.000+05:00

Child Adoption - A term that perhaps receives a lot of admiration but few takers.

We often hear people talking about adoption as the last resort if one is unable to conceive, even after resorting to artificial means. I ask myself why. Several answers come to mind after listening and hearing about child birth and related matters from very many people I've come across. Not surprisingly, atleast for women, most answers relate to experiencing the feeling of a life growing inside them and the fear that their feelings of motherhood would somehow get diluted if the child doesn't come from their own womb. For males, in general, more to do with having a kid who shares their blood line. And for parents and other elders whose opinions may have to be considered, sadly its got nothing to do with the child and everything to do with preserving their lineage and worrying about what the world would think. I've had the good fortune of being acquainted with a few couples who have infact taken the bold yet noble step of not only adopting a child but also raising them successfully. Ofcourse, it is not as easy as it sounds. Apart from the obvious legal, financial and social hurdles that need to crossed, an adopted child's complete acceptance depends upon the support of the entire family.

I wonder why so many people look at adoption as if its a socially wrong thing to do? Isn't it morally right to give hope of a brighter future to someone who has essentially lost the most important thing as soon as they open their eyes to the world? If you ever happen to visit a child shelter, for a moment just stop and carefully look at the eyes of the kids, they will be yearning only for love and affection.

Adopt. You will receive more than you can ever give.

If we're able to accept another person selflessly and completely as our own without any bias then i consider that as a life lived successfully. I believe that if each family adopted and welcomed even one kid in their family, there would be less children out there deprived of parental love and affection.

November 20th - Children's Day And its Motives!

2010-11-21T00:19:00.000+05:00

The world celebrated Universal Children's Day on November 20th. The day was established to encourage all countries to institute a day to promote the welfare of the children and it was also chosen as the day to celebrate childhood. As per UN the main objective of this day is to promote ideas for the welfare of children according to Children Rights marked in 1959.

In 2000 world’s leaders outlined Millennium Development Goals [MDG] which range from having extreme poverty to halting the spread of HIV/AIDS and providing universal primary education till 2015. These goals are specifically for the children in-fact as per UNICEF 6 of the 8 directly relates to children.

Sad to know that regardless of all efforts made by UN & its organizations number of children suffering with hunger, illiteracy & diseases keep on increasing each day. Recent natural disasters of Earthquake in Haiti which affected more than 1 Million children and recent Flooding in Pakistan which made 3.5 million children lives under threat because of lack of safe drinking water, food & non-sufficient medical facilities added more numbers to total children suffering around the globe.

Though natural disaster can happen to any country but the real concern UNICEF has is to save the next generation from hunger & thirst, provide primary education and save them from life-threatening diseases such as HIV/AIDS, Malaria etc. and biggest hurdle its facing of is lack of funds its getting [Donate To UNICEF Here] plus countries themselves not putting enough money to secure their future. There are millions of Children Living on Streets especially in under-developments countries of Asia & Africa where also a high rate of HIV/AIDS Infected Children as well. Along with that Child Abuse cases are on the rise in whole world which is the biggest concern right now.

If we can just spend a bit of our money from our luxuries and share with children living around us with no proper food or clothes and Save the Innocence of few at-least then it will be great help to humanity. Do whatever you can in your capacity, GOD loves the smile of innocence and so does the people who make them smile :-)

Most of the link & info taken from UN Website.

A Movie reflection...

2010-10-28T06:55:00.000+05:00

Yesterday, I went to the movie theater and watched "Hereafter", the latest Clint Eastwood movie. Matt Damon portrays the character of Georges whose Life is being challenged with a gift that he calls a curse. The ability to connect with the spirit of those who have passed away.
I found it very interesting in a way that while the idea of bridging this physical world and the spirit world remains somewhat taboo, no one can ever deny the tremendous interest that human beings have always had with the hereafter.

There are two certainties about Human Life. The first one is It begins and the second is it ends. Everything in between is left to the chain of choices of the beholder.
Interestingly enough, while these two certainties are the most undeniable Truths we can all agree upon, they also are the most proscribed by society as being improper or unacceptable to explore other than by the rules that the societal paradigms and religious institutions are bringing.
Birth is ultimately tied to sex and Death ultimately tied to the Unknown. Two of the major topics that seem to disturb the collective mind for what they imply.
The first one, Sex, implies the most misunderstood act of creation of all times and the second, Death, the most controversial.

So how will Humanity understand its journey when the beginning and the end aren't widely and freely discussed. How can one begin to fathom what Life is while the way it all begins and the way it seems to end cannot even be shared, no matter how "abnormal" the explanation appears?

Ultimately, whatever cannot be discussed with an open mind cannot be spoken, listened & even less understood.
Each and every Truth that is being held because of emotional or physical retributions is an insult to the Freedom of speech and liberty of Choice for any human being.
Each and every Truth that Life brings should have its ability to be spoken out without judgment nor critic.
Each and every Truth that enables a human being to experience his/her own happiness is an act of pure compassion and represents the greatest blessing one can offer to another.
May our collective consciousness rise to a point where Wisdom opens the door to diplomacy, compassion to kindness and Love to Peace...

Can The Golden Rule revive the 21th Century's Human Spirit

2010-10-19T05:44:00.001+05:00

"Treat others as you would like to be treated". The rule beyond all rules. The underlying principle of Life itself. Can such a simple ethic give a new breath to a world that has temporarily lost its way to respect and consideration for self and others?

The law of reciprocity, found in certain forms of philosophies of ancient Babylon, Egypt, Persia, India, Greece, Judea and China, seems to have crossed time and space without fading, at least in words, in its essential yet basic foundation: Respect of the Self and others as the most cherished blessing of all.

Hundreds of years have passed carrying the most amazing wisdom within each religion, from philosophers to philosophers and teachers to teachers, until today.

In 1993, 143 leaders from different faith traditions and spiritual communities signed the Declaration Toward a Global Ethic.

Over 100 leaders agreeing on one and simple principle. The Principle of reciprocity.

Over 15 years later, the same atrocities, the same ignorance and the continuous lack of compassion still spread around like the greatest symbolic pact of Peace and Unity has never taken place.

What will it take for humanity to awaken to the realization that unless it accepts each and every difference as its greatest strength, it is heading towards nowhere.

The very meaning of Life lies in its ability to hold its Harmony and Unity through the uniqueness of all of its parts.

How can the human body hold itself together and function harmoniously if the liver despises the heart? If the heart wishes not to communicate with the brain? If the brain chooses to cut its supply to the nervous system? The whole system simply wouldn't last... The very reason of the well-being of the body is the constant exchange of information between systems and the respectful relationship between these very systems.

The world is an entity built from and around a diversity of species that not only gives it its beauty, but more so sustains its Life.

The Golden Rule, if ever one law was to be chosen to allow Humanity to sustain its Life for the longest time and in the greatest way, is the foundation to the world's existence.

The 21st century is showing more interconnectedness than any other one known to Man. While some remain blind to the necessity of gathering around an idea greater than themselves in Peace and Love, there are also many who share a dream of Unity and Compassion all around the world.

These are the ones who carry the message of the Golden Rule from Antiquity. Those are the visionaries whose heart accepts the mission to show that a family is more than a blood but a way.

Those are the ones who know that one's vulnerability was given for another's strength to rise, making each of us an unique piece of a much greater puzzle and a much greater purpose than our individual existence.

While ignorance remains the greatest evil of all, it is the brother of knowledge. Humanity has always held wisdom and acumen at reach. Many times throughout history, Humanity was somehow tested about its remembrance. Many times, it failed at it... Yet no success has ever come without failures as it is the path to learning.

This time, in our time, we are given more tools, more ways, more understandings and more Love to succeed.

This moment, is our moment to choose a different path. A path that will lead us to Peace.

This world, is our world and was given to us, as a gift, a blessing and a responsibility.

Because on all the rules, laws and principles ever created by human beings to ensure its existence, The golden Rule is the most widely accepted as humanity's greatest rule to co-existence. It has the capability to demonstrate the tremendous potential that the Human Spirit holds. A potential of Infinite Goodness ensuring that the next generation and the generation after this generation will be existing in Peace, prospering in harmony, mercy and Kindness.

Interview with Ayesha Mehmood

2010-10-16T14:42:00.000+05:00

[In Health Insight]

“I was called to be a motivational figure and I talked about life with Thalassemia.”

-Ayesha Mehmood, official spokesperson www.thalassemia.com.pk –

Interview by Sadaf Fayyaz

Ayesha is a Thalassemia victim who has a family history of the deadly disease. She is an official spokesperson for the website and is doing a wonderful job of creating awareness among people on the fatal disease. The campaign was started by her late brother Salman Mehmood, who fought very bravely till the end. Ayesha recently appeared on “The First Blast on Dawn News” and shared some myths regarding the deadly disease. Besides this, she keeps posting updates on her website in form of her blogs too. She also manages the blood bank, guides people regarding blood needed anywhere in Pakistan, along with Farman Ahmed she arrange blood camps as much as possible, she also manages content on thalassemia blog / site and marketing about blood donation camps and registrations.

Tell something about your education and early childhood.

I have done Intermediate in Arts, currently studying for B.A, my childhood has never been different than any other child just because I was special I have to go for blood transfusion once every month with my two other brothers.

When you were first diagnosed with thalassemia?

I was only six months old when I got diagnose with Thalassemia, my other brothers were already been diagnose so it was easy for doctor to understand my symptoms.

It’s an inherited disorder, as a child what difference you felt from other children?

Well, it says the parent’s teaching are the best teaching of entire world you learn from, my family or rather I would say my mom never taught any of my siblings to feel different from other children, she treated us like any other mother treat her kid. We don’t have any difference, we can study, get degrees, get married, have kids, and just a transfusion in month doesn’t stop us from being normal.

Tell something about your website www.thalassemia.com.pk.

Thalassemia.com.pk was founded by my late brother Salman in 2003 just to acknowledge people all around the world about Thalassemia, he wanted to share the suffering of Thalassemia from rest of the world, later on in 2007 we formed a group called Faith (Fight Against Thalassemia) as the need of awareness increased, we decided to arrange more blood drives and awareness camps. Soon we will be registered by Thalassemia International Federation and Thalassemia Pakistan Federation.

Tell something about website www.iwritealot.com.

Iwritealot.com was founded in 2009 to raise funds for the cause of Thalassemia, we use the funds in blood drive or awareness or if we get some information about any needy Thalassemia patient.

What treatment are you getting for it?

Thalassemia treatment is same everywhere in the world, patient have to get transfusion once or twice in a month, depending on the hemoglobin, because of multiple transfusions patient get iron loaded in the body and for that we have to go through iron chelation.

What do you think how is the quality of life of a TA patient?

It totally depend on the treatment and care he / she is getting, if a patient is maintaining hemoglobin at 10 and taking proper care of his iron chelation then his quality of life is improved and he can reach the age of 40 – 50 easily. But just a bit extra care needed.

What are the areas where TA patients need to take a special care about?

Because of compressed immune system we have to care about infections, rather I would say just a bit care on blood counts, if they are down we might catch infection easily, but that happens in any normal person too. So the patient of Thalassemia should be careful on his hemoglobin and iron chelation.

Thalassemia patients can live happily, healthily, get married. Share a few lines on it.

There are few friends of mine who have done LLB, MBA, BBA, and then there are few friends who have got married having kids, living a perfectly normal life, as I said early we just need to maintain the hemoglobin, take proper care of iron chelation then we can achieve anything.

How can a thalassemia patient avoid his/her child from not getting thalassemia? Are there any specific measures for it?

Basically there are two types of Thalassemia, Thalassemia Minor and Thalassemia Major. If anyone has Thalassemia minor should get his partner tested for the Thalassemia Gene, it is considered that Thalassemia minor shouldn’t marry another Thalassemia minor, and in Thalassemia Major the partner must be tested and should be normal, shouldn’t carry Thalassemia gene.

Is there any time you think thalassemia affects your life badly?

Well we are also human beings, we also do have a thing called heart and there are times in everyone’s life where he/she get down and think over his/her life, so yes.., there are the times I have thought that mine or my siblings life could have been better if we were not Thalassemia patients, but then it’s the thing called ‘mayoosi’ which is haram.

Share a few lines about Salman's motivation and how he started this website work.

Salman got this motivation after we lost our elder brother Nauman, Salman had just a single friend in his whole life and that was our brother and after losing him and they way we saw that awareness was nil at that moment, he took the step and created this website so that no one else lose his brother or sister ever again.

How do your colleagues and friends cooperate with you?

Well in our case friends and colleagues have been really great with us, whether it’s about blood drive, awareness camp or it’s my up and down phase of life... they have always been there, some help by promoting our work, some help by being there morally, some help by donating blood.

What is the most critical thing a thalassemia patient need to take care of?

It is Transfusion and Iron Chelation.

Your inspiration for continuing thalassemia awareness comes from?

It comes from my brother Salman, I don’t want to stop the cause he started, because of his efforts we have been managed to help several people around the world, he have done a sadqa-e-jariya and I have to continue it.., I don’t want to be unfair to him and to his memories.

What role do you expect from medical authorities to create thalassemia awareness among people?

After a very long fight we have been managed to get the bill passed for mandatory test before marriage in two assemblies, NWFP Assembly and Sindh Assembly, I wish and hope that they pass the bill in two other assemblies and then get it implemented throughout Pakistan as soon as possible.

What is your message to the readers of Health Insight?

A very simple and short message, get yourself tested for Thalassemia gene today, whether you have a Thalassemia major in your family or not… but to save the next generation please get yourself and family tested today.

Help us in Fight against Thalassemia – www.thalassemia.com.pk

Is Social Media the New way to the Peace Process?

2010-10-12T04:28:00.009+05:00

A world that unites to face adversity
is a world that awakens to its greatest reality
~ Aline Hanle ~

When you choose to look at Humanity through the eyes of your own heart, then you begin to see that beyond politics, fights for power and ideologies brought by the media, there are people standing before you. People with similar dreams of Happiness. People with similar dreams of a meaningful Life to experience. People with
family, children & relatives whose purpose is to create a more loving existence for themselves and their peers.
The 21st century has not only revealed a world of infinite possibilities through new technologies but more so, a world of tremendous opportunities to build peace through interconnectedness. One of the most amazing tools to support such a great adventure is Social Media
Social Media has brought us a gift in the form of information delivered from the people to the people. A direct connection that expresses the most direct way to co-exist.
The monopoly of information detained by the Corporate Media tended to narrow the way the collective consciousness perceives the world providing a single or limited channel for the news to be brought to the mass. The explosion of Social media triggered a flow of inside news that broadened the scope of perspectives given to one event. Incidentally, the mass is becoming empowered with knowledge from different sources.
No greater example can be used to illustrate this matter than the Summer 2010 destructive floods in Pakistan. More than any other natural disasters in the world, this one was recognized by worldwide organizations such as the United Nations as the worst disaster ever seen. The slow and limited response from international aid efforts is partly given to the lack of Corporate Media interest about the precarious humanitarian situation. Indeed, while human lives were desperately in needs for basic medical, food and living supplies, the Media was still reporting terrorism as essential international news from SouthEast Asia.
In the meantime, through Social Media, individual or groups of individuals began to form initiatives to support the Pakistan relief efforts. Raising awareness, displaying information on how to help, sharing useful links, creating videos and documentaries of the situation, translating information in as many languages as possible to spread the words, demonstrating extraordinary compassion, kindness and care for the Pakistani people, sharing prayers, giving voices to those who are there, assisting with ways to support, connecting key individuals to expand initiatives...
Even Secretary of State Hillary Clinton encourages the use of new Social Media to not only connect to friends and family, but also to provide a dialogue for understanding, share innovative ideas and important information and to create social networks.
Social Media took over the lack of humanity that the corporate Media is about and empowered people to believe in the power of interconnectedness, compassion and Friendship.
Twitter, Facebook, Flickr and Youtube are playing a instrumental role in the way we relate to each other. It gives a glimpse of Light to a world that had lost Faith in its own greatness and somehow is now ready to get it back.
To believe in Humanity the way we should all believe in it is to trust that there is goodness in all of it. Given circumstances, there also aremany challenges to overcome. Yet, each time that Love is given a chance to connect one another, unity rises, allowing Peace to become a reality. Social Media provides this chance and if Humanity awakens to this tremendous opportunity, then Peace is a possibility at reach.

Writing for a Cause

The Curse of Child Servitude

They Once Had It All

Watch your actions

Fate or injustice?

Creativity- Gone Forever ???

CSAAM April 2011 : Child Sexual Abuse - the reality

End Of Authoritarians

Rural Entrepreneurship

Education Outreach as a Weapon Against Terrorism in Pakistan

Commercialization of Festivals

Our Attitude Towards Our 'Helpers'

Where Are You Right Now?

The Divorce Effect!!

Blood Diamond Trade

Enhance Creativity in Kids

Keep The Promise!

Child Sexual Abuse

Our Children and Online Predators

The Silent Killer

A complain is a gift

Tryst with Honesty

It's never too late!

What do we prepare ourselves for: Marriage or a Wedding??

Stop Human Trafficking!

Watch Your Kids

Wide Your Vision!

When differences speak the same Truth...

Marital rape – a complete betrayal

Stop Violence Against Women in Pakistan

Nurture our Children

****humanity****

Lets hold their hands(world disable day)

THE 10 MUST HAVES FOR PEACE OF MIND

love him or leave him, but…

Adopt a Life

November 20th - Children's Day And its Motives!

A Movie reflection...

Can The Golden Rule revive the 21th Century's Human Spirit

Interview with Ayesha Mehmood

Is Social Media the New way to the Peace Process?

humanity